The Women Who Ran Away - Sheila O'Flanagan Page 0,66

moved out of the family home before their own relationship had become really serious.

‘Oh Deira. This won’t end well,’ said Gill. ‘Let him get his divorce; you can move in with him after that.’

‘You know quite well it still takes four years to finalise,’ Deira said. ‘Hopefully that’ll change in the future, but I’m not going to sit around for four years. Neither is he. We’re moving in together and that’s that.’

‘It’s really not the divorce thing,’ Gill said, ‘although I don’t trust men who’re divorced. And I’d hate to be someone’s second choice. It’s the age difference.’

Deira had said nothing about being second choice. She wasn’t. She hadn’t even known him when he was first getting married. He hadn’t had the option to choose her. But if a marriage hadn’t worked out, it was surely better to admit it and move on than to live in misery. She’d gritted her teeth and told Gill that age was just a number and didn’t mean a thing. Gill had snorted derisively at that.

But Gill was right: age did matter, she thought now. It meant everything. At least when you were a woman.

‘Deira?’ Gillian’s voice down the line jolted her back to the present. ‘Are you still there?’

‘Yes.’

‘So it’s OK for Bex and Lydia to stay till Friday?’

Deira sighed. ‘Fine.’

‘You could sound slightly more welcoming about it.’

‘What can I say?’ asked Deira. ‘They’re going to stay anyway.’

‘You’re impossible,’ snapped Gillian. ‘You don’t care about anyone but yourself. You never bloody have.’

I cared about Gavin, Deira said to herself. I did the things he wanted me to do. I lived the life he wanted me to lead. I cared about him and his children, and because of that I put them first and I stopped thinking about me. Yet people seem prepared to believe I only think about me because I didn’t get married, because I have a career and because I don’t have children.

‘They’re perfectly welcome to stay,’ she told her sister. ‘Of course they are. It’s unexpected, that’s all.’

‘So is you flitting off to France without a word,’ said Gill. ‘And that’s what I mean about thinking about yourself.’

‘There was no one else to think of,’ Deira said. ‘It’s not like I have to ask your permission.’

‘It would be nice if you’d let me know,’ said Gillian.

Only because you still want to manage my life, thought Deira. To interfere like you did before.

‘Listen, I’ve got to go,’ she said. ‘I’m meeting someone later.’

‘Someone? Who? A man? Have you got back in the saddle already? The stuff in the drawers isn’t enough for you?’

Deira felt her cheeks flame with embarrassment at the knowledge that her sister had seen her sex toys, even as she told herself it was perfectly normal to have them. She was tempted to hang up, but that would have allowed Gill to feel as though she’d scored a point. So instead she kept her voice as casual as possible.

‘You should try them sometime,’ she said. ‘They’re a bit of fun, especially when you’ve got someone to share. But no, I’m not back in the saddle, as you so eloquently put it. I’m travelling with a woman I met on the boat.’

‘Travelling where?’

‘Around France, obviously,’ replied Deira. ‘I’ll be in touch, OK?’

This time she didn’t wait for Gill’s response, but ended the call. A couple of seconds later, her phone buzzed. She looked at the message.

Hey, Deira, thanks for letting me stay on. You’re really good. B xx

Best of luck with the interview, Deira messaged in return, even as she wondered if the job was based in Dublin, and if so, whether Bex would be looking to extend her stay in the house.

It wasn’t true that she didn’t have family, she told herself as she put the phone back in her bag. She did. It was simply that she didn’t have the family she’d wanted.

It was much later that night before Deira and Grace met for a drink on the outdoor terrace that overlooked the sea. Brigitte was already stretched out on the warm tiles, and she padded over to them as soon as they arrived, putting her head on Grace’s knees and drooling happily over her pristine capri pants. Grace rubbed the Labrador’s ears and Deira tentatively asked her about the video.

‘I’ll show you.’ Grace gave Brigitte a final rub, then opened the laptop that she’d brought downstairs with her and played the clip.

Although Grace hadn’t thought that Ken looked ill, Deira was shocked at the appearance of