I’d lost Joshua. I’d lost him, and I hadn’t been able to protect him, but even though the grief and fear from his passing would never leave me, neither would the terror that I could lose Knight too.
The thought had me dipping my chin so I could brush his temple with a kiss.
When he cooed, his bright green eyes peering up at me with a smile in them, I had to marvel at the fact that he was so happy when Eli was such a glum SOB.
Of course, he wasn’t when it was just us, but that was the truth of it.
My male was grumpy most of the time. But I got it. I did.
He had a hell of a lot of responsibility, and even though Austin and Ethan were there to lighten his load, he took his duty seriously.
Honestly, I wasn’t sure if I could love him more because of his dedication to our people.
He wasn’t an absentee leader. None of us were.
We were as involved in the pack as if each member was our family, and that mattered to him. To all of us.
It was about us being accepted, about the stupid hatred for twins in the pack dying a death. It was about unity and community.
And I knew why.
All so that when I gave birth to the next child I was destined to carry, there’d be a place for him or her.
A place that was new, sure, but a place that wouldn’t put him in hatred’s way when they were born.
Where dissent could be sown, Eli had made damn sure that he was there, ready and waiting to stomp it out. Not because he was a control freak, but because we had a purpose.
Our pack was going to grow. The Mother had told us.
And now that I had the placenta to bury? I knew that next step on the path was about to commence.
As I wandered ahead of my men with Knight tucked in my arms, I sighed as the woods moved in around me.
The pack of ‘supernatural’ wolves that had come with us from the realm where we’d been bound, trailed at our sides, as did the other natural wolves, the ones Eli had feared for since they were aggressive when it came to protecting their territory.
He shouldn’t have been scared, however.
My she-wolf, Berry, and her mate, whom I nicknamed Silver, thanks to the streak on his head, had made sure that the naturals were settled and could integrate with their pack. They’d already had pups between them, and none of us were entirely sure what that was going to lead to.
Not even Berry knew, which meant something, because she told me everything.
Just like she’d told me I was carrying Eli’s son.
Just like she’d known when the old council had been planning to storm the barricades—as it were—of the packhouse.
Most of the old council was dead in the aftermath of that silly struggle, where they hadn’t even respected the pack to challenge Eli to a fight they knew they couldn’t win, and ever since, our people had been happier. Calmer.
It was sad that came from the passing of others, but that was life, wasn’t it?
I was just grateful Berry had warned us.
We’d been sleeping, but she’d woken us, and we’d acted.
My men were rarely cold and aggressive. They were, if anything, realizing that it took more than just iron will to rule a pack, but that night, I’d shivered in the face of their wrath.
And I’d admit to being a tiny bit turned on at the sight too.
“Stop,” Berry chided, making my lips twitch. “Scent strong.”
My nose curled at that. “Woman can’t even get a lady boner for her men nowadays. Everyone’s a critic.”
Berry grunted, then padded ahead like my scent was disgusting.
I rolled my eyes at her drama queen ways, even as I pressed a kiss to Knight’s head once more.
I wanted to wrap him up in cotton and never let him go. I didn’t want him in a crib or to be anywhere other than my arms, but I knew that was going to suffocate him, and he was alpha.
Straight to his core.
He was only accepting my clinginess now because he was a newborn. The second he was older? I knew he’d be leaping out of my arms and begging for distance.
I could scent the alpha in him.
Even feared that he’d be stronger than Eli himself, which certainly made for an interesting future.