Winning With Him (Men of Summer #2) - Lauren Blakely Page 0,16

my father. And three thousand miles away from the man I miss.

But it’s also across the street from those fucking hyacinths, and I can’t. I just can’t be that close.

“You’re right,” I say. "Show me something else.”

She sweeps her hand toward the door. “We’ve got a whole city to tackle.”

The next place is off Park Avenue, with a view of the East River. The kitchen is modern, the living room is spacious, and the building has a private gym. It’s a block away from a great sushi place, she says.

But mostly it’s the view I’m buying.

Or really, the view I’m not buying.

“I’ll take it,” I say, and try to focus on what I’ll enjoy about this new place. The same thing I hate about it. That it’s three thousand miles away from San Francisco.

Later that day, I head to meet my mom and her husband for lunch. I bought tickets for them both to come out here for Opening Day, and they arrived last night. I picked this restaurant in the fifties for Tyler—he is second generation Korean-American and loves to check out Korean spots wherever he travels.

As the scent of bibimbap and garlic wafts around me, I find them at a table in the corner. Mom stands to throw her arms around me. “You look the same,” she says, giving me a once-over.

I arch a questioning brow. “Did you expect me to look different?”

I let go of her as Tyler tugs me in for an embrace as well. I love this dude. He’s never afraid to give a full-on hug. No toxic masculinity from him, he likes to say.

“I expected you to look different because you play for the enemy,” Tyler says, deadpan.

I roll my eyes. “Wait. I bought tickets for the two of you and you’re not even going to root for my new team?”

Tyler shakes his head, adamant. “I’ve been a diehard Cougars fan for ages. I don’t think I can root for the New York Comets. It’s against my nature.”

“And you, Mom?” I stare sternly at her.

“Ummmm,” she says.

I wave a hand. “I’m your son. You need to root for me.”

She holds up her hands in surrender. “I’m doing my best.”

I shake my head as I join them at the table. “And to think I got you seats on the first baseline. Guess I’m sorry about that too.”

“We promise to enjoy them,” Mom answers, but the rest of her words fade away when I key in on my own.

Sorry.

I’ve said it over and over today—for little things, things I’m not even really sorry for.

Maybe sorry is on my mind. Maybe it hasn’t left my mind since I sent Grant that text.

“So how was the last week of spring training?” Tyler asks after we order. “Was it an adjustment after four years with the Cougs?”

“Do you miss your Cougar friends?” Mom asks. “It’ll be hard not seeing Crosby and Chance, I’m sure.”

Their questions all seem so normal, no different than any conversation we’ve had about baseball, about work, about friendships.

But there’s so much they don’t know.

So much I keep from them so they won’t worry.

I flash a smile and tell a massive lie that twists inside me. “The last week was great.” I can segue into the truth, and it unknots some of the tight coil inside me. “Tucker is fantastic. Brady’s a cool dude. The new manager is great. It’s all good.”

No lies there. Those specific details of spring training are completely honest.

But I don’t tell Mom how awful the last week has been.

I’ve never been good about telling her how things have been with my dad. She doesn’t need to know what he’s like these days because he’s no longer her burden to bear. After trying so damn hard to save him when I was younger, she’s free of him.

Nobody fought harder to make a marriage work than my mother. Nobody tried more patiently to help an addict. She did everything to get my father help, but he lashed out at her with his baseless accusations. He hurled horrible lies at her and questioned her constantly.

When she finally left him, she was able to have the life that she deserves. She was able to meet Tyler, a man she can have an open, honest relationship with.

I want her to have this happiness, and I won’t fuck it up by telling her how my father turned my spring training into the latest episode of family bribery.

After lunch, Tyler takes off to catch up with a friend