Wind Therapy - A.J. Downey Page 0,34

not yet… but his words from earlier in the week were swirling around in my thoughts, a drop of ink in a glass of water, diffusing through my being and altering me at a molecular level.

He was right. There were better ways of handling the disrespect and I wasn’t talking about his puta of a best friend. I was thinking about my whole life – but right now, the only way I could see to get out and get my brother back was on my back and so I was here.

The toughest part of that? Mav was an excellent lover. Slow, attentive, gentle, all the things I imagined it could be, that it should be, but had never been.

It had me all messed up inside, and rather than fight it, I was so very tempted to just give into it and to pretend.

“It’s okay. You don’t have to tell me,” he said and pressed a firm kiss against my hairline.

I sighed out and closed my eyes, swallowing past the lump in my throat.

“You think you’re ready for this?” he asked, changing the subject, but I was in such an exhausted state of feel good, it took me a second to realize he meant the ride we were leaving on in the morning, not me getting the fuck away from my toxic damn family and taking my brother with me where he would be safe from all their bullshit.

“Yeah!” I said a little too quickly and he chuckled deeply, pressing another kiss, full of affection, to my forehead.

“It’s alright to be nervous,” he murmured. “We get a little wild in a big ol’ pack – it’s true and the Eversong run is the biggest run we do as National. It’ll be alright, so long as you follow the rules and unless you’re in the water you keep that vest on.”

“I won’t go in the water,” I vowed. Mostly because I didn’t know how to swim, but also because I didn’t want there to be any mistakes. I tried not to shudder, but I think I failed.

Mav squeezed me a little tighter and whispered, “Easy, Zaychik. You’re gonna be just fine. I got you.”

I wish I could believe that, I thought earnestly, because as much as I wanted to paint Maverick as just another villain in my story, as much as I wanted to consider him just a means to an end, over the last several days… he had treated me better than anyone had my whole life. He was kind, but firm. Sweet, but definitely alpha, and it left me feeling confused and vulnerable in his embrace. I didn’t like that last part at all, but what could I do? The bargain had been struck, and I was his for the month and after that?

I didn’t know, but I had to come up with something fast.

I fell into an uneasy sleep, light, and restless. I kept waking up. Finally, with the light starting to turn and the birds chirping loudly outside the window, I gave up on all pretense of getting some rest and got up for the day. I stood quietly in the early dawn’s light, the air in the room cool against my skin and watched Maverick sleep for a moment or two.

He was just as attractive asleep as he was when he was awake, only when he slept, it was like the sharp edges smoothed out. His face somehow more open and vulnerable than when he was awake. He seemed… more human.

I sighed and lifted his robe from the hook on the back of his bedroom door, slipping the cool navy-blue satin over my arms and shrugging into it, belting it at my waist with a secure bow as I slipped from the room and down the unfinished hallway. I’d made some progress on cleaning and sorting his little hodge-podge house into some semblance of uniformity. There was, of course, only so much that I could do given the state of some rooms’ finish.

I padded barefoot across the kitchen to the coffee maker and got started preparing a fresh brew. As I was filling the carafe with water at the kitchen sink to fill the machine, his hands fell on my hips in a light touch and he stepped up to my back, his warmth enveloping me.

“Couldn’t sleep?” he asked, his voice an octave low, rough with waking up himself.

“Mm-mm, no,” I murmured and shut off the tap. He swept my hair to one side, over my shoulder,