on a superficial level. And he definitely was keeping his thoughts and feelings to himself. It seemed unlikely he would have had anything to do with Jimmy’s death, but he might have seen something.
Studying him now and trying to guess what he was thinking, Jeff thought he sure looked like he had something important to say but just couldn’t bring himself to say it.
Jeff wondered if anyone else was picking up on Fred’s obvious nervousness, or was he jumping to wrong conclusions again because of things he’d been thinking about earlier.
“How ‘bout you, Fred,” Jeff said.
He didn’t miss Fred’s reaction. His left leg twitched, and his eyes widened as though he’d gotten a mild electrical shock. In the glow of the firelight, his face looked as pale as paper.
“What? What about me?” Fred’s voice sounded tight and higher than normal.
Jeff shrugged, trying to look totally casual about the discussion, but he was suddenly convinced Fred had something really important on his mind. He didn’t know the guy, so he didn’t know if would have to coax it out of him or if he would have to pressure him to confess whatever he was hiding. He knew he should let Fred keep whatever it was to himself, but Jeff didn’t want to do that … especially if it had anything to do with Jimmy’s death.
“You sure look like you got something on your mind,” Jeff said. “Is there anything you want to tell us?”
Fred bit down on his lower lip until it went bloodless as he shook his head vigorously. The tightness around his mouth and eyes indicated something definitely was bothering him. His hand started shaking as he raised his beer to take a sip. When he swallowed, his throat made a loud gulping sound.
“Come on,” Evan said. “Tell us.” He seemed not to have noticed Fred’s reaction and was just playing along with the discussion. “What’s the worst thing you ever did?”
“Could we talk about something else?” Fred asked. His voice wavered, and he had trouble looking directly at any one of them for more than a second or two. A hint of frantic desperation lit his eyes. Jeff caught it even if no one else did.
“Why’s that?” Evan asked.
There was no way Jeff could miss the sudden shift in Evan’s tone of voice as he leaned forward practically glaring at Fred, who withered visibly under such his intense stare.
“No … No reason,” Fred said. “I just think after … after all these years, maybe there’s something a bit more—you know, more interesting to talk about.”
“By the expression on your face,” Evan said, now leering at him, “I’d say you’ve got some serious shit you’re holding back.”
“No … no way,” Fred said. His voice was high and strained as he looked at the floor and shook his head in vigorous denial.
“Come on,” Tyler said, bristling at Evan. “Back off, will you? He obviously doesn’t want to talk about it.”
“Yeah,” Mike piped in. “Let’s change the subject.”
Evan turned on both of them with an angry fire in his eyes.
“No,” he said coldly. “I’m interested. And I think it would be good for ole’ Freddie-boy here to talk about whatever’s bugging him. That’s what we’re all about here, aren’t we?” He looked from person to person as though soliciting support he knew he wasn’t going to find. “We trust each other one hundred percent, don’t we? Well …? Don’t we?”
For a long, uncomfortable moment, no one said a word. The logs in the fire blazed and crackled.
“Sure we can,” Jeff finally said. He was feeling sorry about starting it all by pressing Fred the way he had. If Fred or anyone else didn’t want to talk about something, they didn’t have the right to force it out of them. “I’m just saying … if he doesn’t want to—”
“Aww, come on. What is it?” Evan said, cutting Jeff off and turning to Fred. “Did you kill someone or something? Is that it?”
Jeff like where this was going. It was just like when they were kids and, without ever talking about it or agreeing on it, somehow they all picked the one kid in the tent to heap their abuse on—the scapegoat. Usually it was someone who was new that year, but was that what Fred was now … their scapegoat? For what?
Jeff’s anger flared at Evan when he saw the wounded expression on Fred’s face. Before, he had been looking tense and worried, but now he looked like he was so scared