Wicked as Lies (Wicked & Devoted #3) - Shayla Black Page 0,47
insisted on standing sentry in case she needed him. But the cooler winds of spring had given way to the sweltering oppression of a Louisiana summer. He was gone. Hell, for all she knew, he was spending time with Madison.
Even the woman’s name pissed her off.
Hallie howled again, and Tessa jogged down the hall. “Coming, baby girl.”
When she rounded the corner, Hallie sat up in her crib, cheeks red and tears perched on the edges of her long, wispy lashes. She stopped wailing and dialed her unhappiness back to a pout when she caught sight of Tess.
“What’s the matter, sweet pea? Bad dream?”
Hallie stuck her pink bottom lip out just a bit more.
“Come here.” She reached into the crib.
Her daughter met her halfway, raising her arms like she couldn’t wait for Tessa to hold her.
These were some of the moments she loved being a mommy most—the closeness, the cuddling, the sweetness. The fact Hallie seemed to love it, too, filled Tessa’s heart full.
After a fresh diaper and a wardrobe change into a pink dress with a cute matching floral headband, she smiled big at her daughter. “You hungry?”
Hallie made grunting noises, slapping her little legs as she gurgled and grinned.
“I’ll take that as a yes.” She lifted Hallie off her changing table, warmed her bottle, then took a deep breath.
This was it.
“Time to meet your daddy, sweet pea.”
Tessa stepped onto the back patio to find Cash standing beside one of the bright rockers she’d found at a thrift store and repainted. He was furiously texting and cursing under his breath—until she shut the back door. Then he stopped and pocketed his phone.
“You okay?”
“Yeah. Fine. Just—” He shook his head. “Annoying people. Not important.” Then he turned his attention on Hallie. “This is who I’m here to meet. Wow, she’s gorgeous.”
“She really is.”
“Look at her…” he said with wonder. “She has my hair, but she has your eyes.”
“Yeah.” Tessa smiled fondly. “It’s so interesting to look at her and see parts of us both. And it’s more pronounced every day.”
Hallie stared at Cash. Then she fell silent, frowned, and buried her face in Tessa’s shoulder.
“She’s barely awake. And she’s a little shy with strangers,” she explained, patting the baby’s back.
“I understand. Hell—I mean, heck—I’m not too good with strangers, either.”
Tessa carried Hallie to the bright pink rocker, leaving the turquoise one to Cash. They both sat, and he watched with wonder as Hallie started to eat.
“She looks healthy.”
“She’s still a little underweight for her age, but the pediatrician isn’t worried.”
“Good.” Cash just stared at Hallie as if she was the most amazing being on the planet. “Tell me everything about her.”
Tessa hit the high points, talking about Hallie’s birth, her first few days home, the long weeks she had her days and nights mixed up, and the difficulty of putting her in daycare when Tessa’s heart had urged her to stay home with her beautiful baby girl.
“You’ve done amazing by yourself. I can’t imagine how difficult all that was and you just…did it.”
“I had to.”
He nodded. “And I was a coward.”
“You’re Peter Pan,” she corrected. “I don’t think you’re afraid of difficulty or hard work. It’s that you never wanted to grow up.”
“You’re right. And rehab has given me new perspective. Now I am grown up. I want to stand on my own two feet.” He shook his head. “I never want to feel like a ridiculous screwup again. It’s a shame I refuse to repeat.”
Maybe he meant that. Maybe the difficulty of overcoming his addiction to alcohol had fundamentally changed the way he viewed himself and life. And maybe he was blowing smoke up her ass.
When Hallie had finished with her bottle, Tessa set it on the table beside her and sat Hallie on her knee, bouncing her and making happy baby noises.
“You’re a natural.”
“When you’re a parent, you have to be.”
“Yeah, I guess so.” He let out a breath. “Can I hold her?”
Instinctively, she pulled her daughter closer. “I don’t know if either of us is ready for that.”
Cash pressed his lips together. She was sorry if her answer upset him, but she had to be practical.
“I get it.” He sent her a self-deprecating smile. “I don’t like it, but I get it.”
They made small talk for another few minutes, but Hallie got cranky in the heat. Even with the ceiling fan on high, Cash started sweating, and Tessa felt as if she needed another shower.