“Do not go near that boy while he has your bead. Do you forget he could control you if he knew?”
“But he doesn’t know,” Miyoung pointed out.
“Unless he’s a complete idiot, which I wouldn’t completely discount as a possibility, he’ll figure it out soon. Don’t go near that boy, Miyoung.”
She almost gave in. The anger in Yena’s voice could still cause her to freeze in fear. But she was so tired and run-down from weeks of failure and hunger. She just wanted one thing to hold on to. And though he never seemed that happy to be spending time with her, just seeing Jihoon’s face every day was a small boost that kept her exhaustion at bay for a while. So she added some iron to her voice. “You can’t tell me what to do anymore, Mother.”
Then she hung up.
“That was your mother?” Jihoon asked from the doorway.
54
“YENA IS BACK?” Jihoon asked, stepping into the room.
Miyoung whipped around, holding her phone behind her back as if she were hiding evidence of a crime. Then she lifted her chin, recovering her composure. “My mother is none of your business.”
“She is if she hurt my halmeoni. This could be the solution we’ve been looking for; why wouldn’t you tell me she’s back?”
“It’s complicated.” Miyoung’s lips pulled down at the corners.
“You said you’d help me.”
“Telling you where Yena is wouldn’t be helping you.”
He could tell there was something she wasn’t saying, and it infuriated him that she was keeping secrets when his halmeoni’s life was at stake.
“What if she can tell us what she did to my halmeoni?” Jihoon worked hard to keep his tone even, but there was still frustration in every syllable.
Miyoung shook her head fervently. “You can’t blame my mother for your halmeoni.”
Jihoon couldn’t believe what he was hearing. The vehemence with which Miyoung defended her mother. Like she truly didn’t think Yena had done anything wrong. His halmeoni had lain in a coma for almost three months, and Miyoung still thought her mother was without blame.
“My halmeoni is all I have. And your mother didn’t care about that when she took her away from me.”
This seemed to break something in Miyoung. Her fists clenched tightly against her sides. Her face flushed. “Your halmeoni is not in the hospital because of my mother. She’s old and mortal. Mortals die. It’s what you do!”
Jihoon’s vision became a haze. People say the color of anger is red, but his was white. Pure white washing out the world and filling his mind until he thought he’d erupt in a burst of light.
“Of course you’d say that,” he shouted. “You have no idea what it’s like to have a family. Your mother’s a monster and your own father didn’t even want you!”
He regretted the words as soon as they were free.
Miyoung’s hand whipped out, cracking across his cheek.
She stormed out of the room and Jihoon didn’t stop her.
55
JIHOON CALLED MIYOUNG the next day, but she didn’t answer. Or, as he suspected, she was screening her calls.
His shift at the CU Mart was a small piece of hell. Stuck behind the counter when he really wanted to find Miyoung and explain himself. He didn’t want to feel this guilt, the kind that sat on his lungs like a taunting demon.
“If it’s bothering you this much, just go to her house.” Somin leaned against the counter, sucking on a yogurt drink.
“I would if I knew where she was living now.” Jihoon jabbed at the keys of the register as he wallowed. It wasn’t his fault, he told himself for the twentieth time that day. She’d just made him so mad.
“I told you it was a bad idea to let that girl back into your life,” Somin pointed out unhelpfully.
“I don’t need another lecture.” Jihoon let his head drop onto the counter in frustration. He’d hit on a sensitive spot with Mi-young because he knew it would hurt her. That was all he’d wanted in the moment, to make her suffer like he was suffering. His halmeoni had raised him to know better, to be better.
The door to the convenience store opened and he jerked upright. Then he let himself slump again as Junu walked in.
“What do you want?” Jihoon asked.
“I’m pretty sure that greeting is not in the employee training manual.”
“I’m pretty sure you’re not only here to buy ramyeon,” Jihoon retorted.
Junu laughed, then noticed Somin standing in front of Jihoon, legs spread like she was ready