When Darkness Ends (Moments in Boston #3) - Marni Mann Page 0,45
fucking sorry.
Please forgive me.
Please …
I wanted her to hug me back, to wrap her cotton-filled arms around me and squeeze.
To tell me everything was going to be all right.
To cradle the back of my head and rub my hair, like I was doing to her now and how my mom had done to me when I was younger.
But there was none of that, just her presence and the feel of her against me.
I would take it.
Because having her here—even if she was his—meant I wouldn’t have to endure this alone.
Thirty-One
Before
Ashe
“Three,” everyone screamed from inside the bar, holding their glasses high in the air. “Two,” they continued the countdown. “One,” they finished before shouting, “Happy New Year!”
I lowered my beer, and instead of taking a drink, I squeezed Pearl’s waist and kissed her. She wrapped her arms around my neck, her lips parting to let in my tongue. I pulled her against my chest and set down the bottle, so I could lift her into my arms.
When I’d found out she had to work New Year’s Eve, there wasn’t a question as to where the guys and I were going to hang out this evening. She had reserved a table for the four of us in her section, and after last call, she would be coming back to my place to spend the night.
And tomorrow morning, while we cuddled in my bed, I was going to ask her if I could meet Gran.
Almost four months had passed since she had run into me in the hallway. She didn’t need to hide anything from me anymore. She could trust me. Nothing would change the way I felt about my girl, and I wasn’t going anywhere.
I would keep saying those words until she believed them.
Until they lived in her heart.
Where she lived in mine.
I brushed my lips across her mouth and whispered, “Happy New Year, Pearl.”
Her legs squeezed my waist, her arms balancing on my shoulders. “Happy New Year.”
I stared into her eyes, still in awe that she was mine. “God, I’m so fucking crazy for you.”
“Mmm,” she moaned, a smile covering her gorgeous face as she pulled her lips away. “My year starts with you.” Her grin grew even wider. “That couldn’t make me happier.”
I gripped her ass, feeling how perfect it was. “I’m never letting you go.”
“You’d better not.”
“This year is going to be all about fun.” I rubbed my nose over hers. “Are you ready for that?”
“Yes.” She tightened her hold on me, hugging me with all her strength. “The only time I’ve ever been able to close my eyes and feel safe is when I’ve been with Gran.” Her legs locked, feet resting against my lower back, as she cupped my neck with her palm. “And now, Ashe, I feel that with you.”
I rubbed my thumb over her chin, staring into her eyes, accepting the best gift she could have ever given me.
Thirty-Two
Before
Pearl
As I cuddled into Ashe’s chest, the smell of New Year’s was still on his skin. Remnants of the beer I’d served him and the smoke from the bar. A holiday I’d always dreaded working even though the money was amazing because it was so crowded that I could barely get around and everyone was incredibly sloppy and only getting drunker as the evening went on.
Yesterday had been different.
Ashe was the silver lining.
The sweetest, gentlest man coming in with his friends, just so he could spend the whole night with me. When the bar began the countdown, he’d searched the crowd until he found me, joining our lips as the clock hit midnight.
I couldn’t have asked for a better shift.
Or a better way to start the year.
And as I stared up at his face, I truly didn’t know how I’d gotten so lucky.
I was just grateful I had taken off my shoes and stopped running, or I would have missed something extremely beautiful.
He stirred as I brushed my fingers over his scruff, his eyes slowly coming awake.
“Mmm,” he groaned so softly. “Morning.” He rubbed his hand over my naked back, massaging between my shoulder blades. “How did you sleep?”
“Perfect.”
He kissed my forehead, leaving his lips there for an extra few seconds. “I’m glad.”
“Are you hungover?”
I’d served him enough beer last night to guess he probably had a little bit of a headache even though his eyes were clear and he wasn’t wincing.
“Not too bad.”
He put his hand in my hair, brushing through the strands, and I rested my face against his chest, the movement so relaxing.