you home in twenty minutes,” he says. He places cash on the table to cover the bill and we gather our bags and coats. He takes my hand when we get outside and I feel a giddy lightness in my chest. Something I haven’t felt in so damn long.
Most of the time, I am a ball of stress and anxiety, never knowing what kind of state I might find my mother in.
But right now, it’s just about me.
Well, about us. Because as we stand on the sidewalk, waiting for the car, Billy pulls me into his arms and kisses me.
My knees melt and my belly flip-flops, and I sigh against him. His kiss is deep, and long, and sends a wave of desire through me I’ve never felt before.
I don’t want the kiss to end — ever — but a car horn honks, and we pull back, Billy’s hand cupping my cheek and his eyes meeting mine.
“God, I can’t wait to do that again.”
Then we get into the car, hands held tight, and I swear I’ve died and gone to heaven.
Chapter Three
Billy
The next week is a blur of work at the carwash where I work and listening to my sister, Kourtney, gush about the fact she is going to marry my boss.
My dad is away on business a lot, but he’s home now, and I’m glad. I need to talk to him about Bailey.
Every day, I make sure she gets home before I head to work, but I need a car. Dad always said he would help, but I have the money now to do it on my own.
“I am thinking of getting one from the Ford dealership downtown,” I explain. “I have money saved, and I need a car now. I can’t wait until college in the fall.”
“Why the rush?” Dad asks. “I swear, a month ago you said you might not want to buy one at all.”
“Things have changed. Bailey needs—”
Dad cuts me off. “Bailey — this the girl you are taking to the dance?”
I nod. I have plans to do more than dance with her — but my dad doesn’t need to know that right now. It would freak him out.
And no, I’m not talking about sleeping with her, either.
It’s bigger, more important than that.
“I love her, Dad.”
“You what?”
We’re sitting at the kitchen table and I know he’s surprised, but I press forward. “I do. And she’s been through hell. Having a car will mean I can help get her where she needs to go.” I know I’m being vague, but Dad will lose his mind if I tell him everything I’m thinking.
“What aren’t you saying?” Dad asks.
“Look, I’m just saying I love her — I have since we were in middle school. It’s not a phase. And Bailey’s life is hard. Ours is easy. If I can make things better for her, I will.”
Dad exhales. “Look, I was going to wait for graduation, but I was planning on buying your car.”
“Really? You don’t have to.”
“I want to, Billy. Let’s go this afternoon, get you your first car. Save your money.”
“You know what, Dad? Actually, that means a lot.” I swallow, knowing if I don’t just come out and say what I’m thinking, I might regret it forever. “Dad, saving my money is important right now because I plan to marry Bailey.”
Dad runs a hand over his jaw, trying to understand me. “You’re in high school.”
“For a few more weeks, yeah.”
“You’re not thinking,” he says, shaking his head. “You have a whole future, a whole—”
“Just like you and Mom?” I know my words are tough to hear, but it’s the truth. “You married her when you were both nineteen, before you went into the Army. And she died way too young. Are you saying you regret marrying her because you had a whole life ahead of you?”
“It’s different,” Dad says, tearing up.
“Different how?”
He places a hand on my shoulder. “Because, well… because, Billy, I don’t want you to struggle like your mom and I did in those early years. I want more for you.”
“Yeah, but you and Mom didn’t have family to support you through the hard times. I do.”
“No decision has to be made tonight, does it? I mean, hell, Billy, I haven’t even met this girl.”
“You will soon enough, Dad,” I tell him. “And you’ll know her for the rest of your life.”
I’m still a little shaky from the heart-to-heart I had with my dad today. I know he thinks I’ve lost my mind, but