A Warrior s Desire - By Pamela Palmer Page 0,48

Hell, how could he ever expect her to understand him when he didn't understand himself? "Tarrys."

She continued to ignore him, so he pressed forward.

"I don't find making love to you disagreeable.

Not at all.

Being with you has been the best sex I've ever had."

She looked at him and then turned away.

"The problem is, you love me.

And I don't love you."

Now he was just digging himself a bigger hole.

Somehow he had to make her understand.

"It's not that I don't want to.

It's that I can't love you.

It's not in me."

He scrubbed his face with his hands.

Love...the kind that made you dependent on another, that made you weak...wrecked lives.

He'd seen it happen too many times.

His dad's desertion had sent his mom spiraling down into depression and alcoholism, leaving his sons to fend for themselves at a tender age.

At eleven years old he'd lost two parents, but learned a hard, if valuable, lesson - never let anyone matter so much that they destroy you when they leave.

Harrison had failed to learn that lesson and was now divorced.

Charlie refused to go down that path.

He kept his relationships casual and short.

Always.

"I don't want to lead you on, Tarrys.

I don't want you to think I might fall in love with you someday.

It's not fair to either one of us."

Her pace slowed as she looked at him with genuine confusion.

"What does love have to do with sex?" He frowned.

"Usually a lot."

The look she threw him told him clearly that she thought he was an idiot.

"You're afraid my loving you makes me too weak to have sex with you?" "No," he said with exasperation.

"It's just..." Hell, he didn't even know what his point was anymore.

Maybe it didn't have anything to do with her.

It was him.

He was the one in danger if he didn't pull away from her.

Which was equally ridiculous.

"I'm not hurt that you don't love me, Charlie," Tarrys said softly.

"I never expected you to.

And since it makes you so uncomfortable, I won't say it again.

But until we reach a carnasserie bush and the antidote for the trimor poisoning, I must share my power with you from time to time or you'll die."

Temper snapped in her eyes.

"But I will endeavor to quit loving you."

She was mocking him.

Or maybe she wasn't.

His stomach fell away.

Could she really quit caring that easily? Hell, why not? He'd certainly given her more than enough reason to.

But instead of being relieved at the thought, he felt like he'd been punched in the gut.

Nearly two weeks later, Charlie held Tarrys tight in his arms, her head tucked under his chin, her naked warmth covering the length of him as she lay atop him.

He was still buried deep inside her and he knew it was time to get going again.

But his arms wouldn't budge even though a melancholy had invaded his mood as it always did when they had sex.

If only he could hold on to the euphoria, the feeling of total rightness, that filled him whenever he sank into her.

Every time, as he clung to the last threads of control, the euphoria drained away.

They were making love daily now.

Tarrys had become a drug he craved ever since he'd quit fighting his need for her, accepting that for a reason he couldn't fathom, release inside her body kept the effects of the poison at bay.

He needed to make love to her.

He needed her, period.

Every day, he fell a little more under her spell.

Every time he held her in his arms, he found it harder to let her go.

He stroked her hair and kissed the top of her head as he opened his eyes to the low ceiling of the tunnel.

They'd left the ease of the caverns days ago.

He had a recurring nightmare that these paths didn't actually lead anywhere.

That they were part of a maze with no end that would leave them spiraling within the mountain forever.

At moments like these, with Tarrys tight in his arms, he wasn't sure he cared.

As long as they remained within the mountain, she'd never leave him.

The thought hit him from out of nowhere, jarring him unpleasantly, and he shoved it aside.

"We need to get going."

Tarrys pulled back and looked down at him, her violet eyes glowing with fathomless intensity in the reddish light from the crystal.

He lifted a hand and slid his thumb across her cheek.

So beautiful.

How was it possible to want her more each day than he had the day before? Tarrys dipped her head to lay a kiss on his shoulder.

Tenderness rose inside him until he thought it would swallow