A Walk to Remember - By Nicholas Sparks Page 0,58

you that I prayed for you,” she finally said to me, “what did you think I was talking about?”

The progression of her disease continued, speeding up as March approached. She was taking more medicine for pain, and she felt too sick to her stomach to keep down much food. She was growing weak, and it looked like she’d have to go to the hospital to stay, despite her wishes.

It was my mother and father who changed all that.

My father had driven home from Washington, hurriedly leaving although Congress was still in session. Apparently my mother had called him and told him that if he didn’t come home immediately, he might as well stay in Washington forever.

When my mother told him what was happening, my father said that Hegbert would never accept his help, that the wounds were too deep, that it was too late to do anything.

“This isn’t about your family, or even about Reverend Sullivan, or anything that happened in the past,” she said to him, refusing to accept his answer. “This is about our son, who happens to be in love with a little girl who needs our help. And you’re going to find a way to help her.”

I don’t know what my father said to Hegbert or what promises he had to make or how much the whole thing eventually cost. All I know is that Jamie was soon surrounded by expensive equipment, was supplied with all the medicine she needed, and was watched by two full-time nurses while a doctor peeked in on her several times a day.

Jamie would be able to stay at home.

That night I cried on my father’s shoulder for the first time in my life.

“Do you have any regrets?” I asked her. She was in her bed under the covers, a tube in her arm feeding her the medication she needed. Her face was pale, her body feather light. She could barely walk, and when she did, she now had to be supported by someone else.

“We all have regrets, Landon,” she said, “but I’ve led a wonderful life.”

“How can you say that?” I cried out, unable to hide my anguish. “With all that’s happening to you?”

She squeezed my hand, her grip weak, smiling tenderly at me.

“This,” she admitted as she looked around her room, “could be better.”

Despite my tears I laughed, then immediately felt guilty for doing so. I was supposed to be supporting her, not the other way around. Jamie went on.

“But other than that, I’ve been happy, Landon. I really have. I’ve had a special father who taught me about God. I can look back and know that I couldn’t have tried to help other people any more than I did.” She paused and met my eyes. “I’ve even fallen in love and had someone love me back.”

I kissed her hand when she said it, then held it against my cheek.

“It’s not fair,” I said.

She didn’t answer.

“Are you still afraid?” I asked.

“Yes.”

“I’m afraid, too,” I said.

“I know. And I’m sorry.”

“What can I do?” I asked desperately. “I don’t know what I’m supposed to do any-more.”

“Will you read to me?”

I nodded, though I didn’t know whether I’d be able to make it through the next page without breaking down.

Please, Lord, tell me what to do!

“Mom?” I said later that night.

“Yes?”

We were sitting on the sofa in the den, the fire blazing before us. Earlier in the day Jamie had fallen asleep while I read to her, and knowing she needed her rest, I slipped out of her room. But before I did, I kissed her gently on the cheek. It was harmless, but Hegbert had walked in as I’d done so, and I had seen the conflicting emotions in his eyes. He looked at me, knowing that I loved his daughter but also knowing that I’d broken one of the rules of his house, even an unspoken one. Had she been well, I know he would never have allowed me back inside. As it was, I showed myself to the door.

I couldn’t blame him, not really. I found that spending time with Jamie sapped me of the energy to feel hurt by his demeanor. If Jamie had taught me anything over these last few months, she’d shown me that actions—not thoughts or intentions—were the way to judge others, and I knew that Hegbert would allow me in the following day. I was thinking about all this as I sat next to my mother on the sofa.

“Do you think we have a