all but told him last night she wanted to leave, to forget the whole mess. He couldn’t make her stay, not if she didn’t want to. But he wouldn’t let her go without a fight, either. Not after this morning.
When she stopped struggling, he eased back, swiped tears from her cheeks. “I love you, Julia. I’m not going to let you get hurt again. I promise.”
Her arms slid around his neck, and she rested her head against his shoulder. “Why do you have to date her? Why can’t you just be friends?”
“Because I love her, baby,” he said softly into her hair. “Because I have for a long time, since way before you were born. That doesn’t stop just because someone says it should. It doesn’t stop because time goes by. It’s always there.”
“But you don’t love her. You love Mom.”
He leaned back to look at her. She was so much like her mother. The same eyes, the same chin. The same silly dent in her cheek. That same stubborn nature. With gentle fingers he brushed back a lock of her hair. “She is Mom, baby.”
She pulled him back, hiding her face in his chest.
“Please, Julia.” Tears stung the backs of his eyes. “Please try, for me. I need you to at least make an effort. This friction is killing me.”
She sniffled and wiped her eyes, clinging to him as if he were her last lifeline. She was silent for so long, he didn’t know what to say or do. They had to get through this. They had to.
“Okay,” she finally said. “I’ll try, but not for her. Only for you.”
It wasn’t the answer he longed to hear, but it was a start. And it was more than he’d had yesterday.
When he moved back, he wiped her tear-streaked cheeks again. She was his everything, but even for her he couldn’t stop loving the only woman he’d ever wanted.
“Thank you, Julia.” He smoothed her hair back from her face. “Are we okay here?”
“Yeah, I guess so.”
She was lying. He could see it in her eyes. But he wanted to believe her words, needed to in order to stay sane. “Good.”
He rose and grasped her hand. “Come on. I’m starving. We need to get downstairs before Grandpa eats everything. You know how he likes eggs and pancakes.”
Julia followed him out the door, and as he headed toward the laughter coming from the kitchen, for the first time in months—years—Ryan felt that ice in his chest begin to thaw. For the first time in forever, he had hope.
***
Ominous gray clouds threatening rain hovered over the city. A thin fog settled on the ground, and a gentle breeze rustled leaves in the trees. If the weather was any indication of what lay ahead, Kate wasn’t sure she wanted to keep searching.
They’d gotten a later start than she’d hoped for. After retrieving her old laptop and purse from the attic where he’d stored it after her accident, Ryan had left for an hour to deal with a situation at work. Seeing her old things did nothing for Kate’s memory, but she hadn’t expected much. Still, it was weird to look at something that had once been hers. And to feel nothing.
Shaking off the melancholy that brought, she arranged for some time off from the journal at Ryan’s insistence. Tom’s secretary hadn’t sounded happy about passing on her request, but Kate wasn’t up for arguing with Ryan over this one. At least not until she found out who at the publishing house had been involved with her disappearance.
She checked addresses as Ryan drove along the waterfront. The car bounced over a speed bump along Harbor Drive, and she shifted in the leather seat. Ryan’s new Jag stuck out like a sore thumb down here, black and shiny, so unlike the rusted pickups and worn compacts parked in most driveways along this dilapidated stretch of road.
Glancing sideways at him in the fancy car, she was reminded of his success. There were moments she forgot he was practically a celebrity, forgot about his wealth and prestige. When they were alone together, he was just like any other guy. He didn’t live like a man who made millions, didn’t act like he could buy and sell you at the drop of a hat. But then there were moments she’d see a look in his eye or hear him on the phone with a business associate, and she’d remember how powerful he really was.