pages of things Teddy could do to change her life, fix her problems, find her passion.
“This is really scary,” Teddy said, clutching her tiny teacup with both hands.
“That’s how you know it’s the right thing to do,” Kirsten said as the servers brought out their scones and finger sandwiches.
Teddy’s phone buzzed, and her tea sloshed out of the cup when she saw Richard’s name on her screen. At first, she felt that familiar comfort/panic she always felt when he texted her—the sense that whatever he said would be a clear directive, but also the knowledge that she’d have to drop whatever she was doing to make it happen.
But this time, she thought about Everett’s latest email and how he called Richard her shitty ex-boyfriend. He kind of was, wasn’t he?
Her mouth went dry and she had to take a sip of oolong before she could whisper, “I came up with another item for my list. I think I want to tell Richard no.”
“Gimme, gimme, gimme,” Eleanor said, making grabby hands across the table. Teddy handed her the phone and Eleanor read the text out loud. “‘Hey, babe. Wondered if you wanted to come over tonight? Miss you.’”
“‘Babe’?!” Kirsten said, offended.
“It’s only ‘babe,’” Teddy muttered. “It’s not like he called me the c-word or something.”
Eleanor sputtered and almost spit out her tea sandwich. “I mean, yeah, okay, but that’s a pretty low standard.”
“Richard having the gall to refer to you as babe is too much, and I will not stand for it,” Kirsten said, raising her voice. “He might as well be calling you the c-word.”
Someone loudly coughed, and the three of them looked at the next table, where a father sat with a small boy and girl, the three of them wearing crowns and enjoying the restaurant’s princess-prince tea. The little boy took a drink of his chocolate milk.
“Sorry,” Kirsten said, inexplicably doing a half bow at the table. But then, to the girls, she muttered, “That dude needs to chill. It’s not like I actually said the c-word. Listen, we know Richard never liked us.”
“That’s not true! He . . . he liked you guys,” Teddy tried to protest, but her voice trailed off and she wasn’t very convincing.
Kirsten spoke more quietly, chastened by the table next to them. “Come on, Teddy. He kept you isolated in that town house. It was weird, right?”
Teddy sighed. “I know it’s easy to blame Richard for everything. But I kept myself isolated, too, you know. It was easier.”
Kirsten gave Teddy a serious look. “Listen, I know this might be hard to hear, but do you think you were Richard’s girlfriend, or do you think you were his unpaid personal assistant?”
Teddy sat back in her chair. Kirsten was right—this was hard to hear. She thought about all the meals she’d cooked, the floors she’d vacuumed, the bathrooms she’d cleaned. The appointments she’d scheduled, the moods she’d managed, the exams she’d helped him study for.
“When you put it that way . . . I guess unpaid personal assistant,” she said, defeated.
Eleanor waved her hands. “You know what? We’re gonna respond to him. Do you trust me?”
“Do I . . . ,” Teddy faltered.
Eleanor leaned forward and grabbed her hand. “I said . . . do you trust me, Teddy?”
“Yes,” Teddy said with a nod.
“Okay.” Eleanor sat back, tapped out a quick text, then handed her phone back. “Done.”
Teddy looked at the screen and read the text out loud. “‘No.’ That’s . . . it?”
“You said you’d tell him no.”
Teddy felt her heart drop into her chest and then to her knees. What would Richard say? What would he think? What if he really did need her? She’d never, ever said no to him, or really anyone else, before. She’d even gone along with him asking her to move out, willingly removing her things from his place simply because he’d requested it. The thought that Richard was at his place right now sitting on his couch, staring at his phone, and feeling annoyed filled her with terror.
A small giggle escaped her throat. And then a bigger one. And then she was full-on laughing, the kind of laugh that sent tears rolling down her cheeks.
Eleanor and Kirsten exchanged a look. The dad at the next table stared at her. The little girl in the princess crown asked, “Is she okay, Daddy?”
“I’m fine,” Teddy said to the girl, attempting to find composure. “It’s just . . . Have you ever been so terrified to do something, and