I watched, mesmerized, as she made her way to the door. “I could get used to this,” I muttered. But then, as the door clicked shut, I turned and gave him a deflated pout. “So, what’s this work?”
“Hush, love.” He tilted my chin up to face him. A slow grin spread across his face. “I’m the work, aye?”
“Oh.” I gave him a tentative smile. I still didn’t fully believe that there was a guy out there who’d seek me out simply for the purpose of spending time together. “Really?”
His low, husky laugh reverberated through me. “Really. I thought you’d have deduced it by now.” He slipped his hand under my hair, sliding warm fingers along the back of my neck, cupping it gently. “I’m purely a man of sport and leisure.”
I let my smile broaden. “That sounds”—he leaned down to nuzzle my neck, and my breath hitched—“good.”
He nipped at my ear, his breath tickling along my tender skin. “I had to see you.”
I shivered, contented. Safe. “I knew you’d come.”
“Always.” He tugged me closer. Tighter. “I felt you. Losing heart.”
“Sounds serious.” I tried to laugh it off, but it came off lame, so I began to confess. “I guess I’ve been kind of…” But I trailed off, not trusting my voice.
“Kind of…?” he prompted.
This contact, this closeness, it made me feel raw, split open. As though I might finally let go, only I wasn’t sure that I wanted to lose my armor—who knew what would happen if I ever did that, what feelings I might discover hiding beneath my shell?
He pulled from me and cupped my face. He was a creature of infinite power—as a man, he’d been a warrior, and as a vampire, who knew? I was still just beginning to grasp the full extent of his strength and abilities. And yet here he was, his hands cradling me tenderly, his touch so gentle on my skin. “Tell me, love.”
There it was…the sound of my armor cracking.
“I can’t stop thinking about Emma,” I confessed. “I think not all is what it seems. Do you think it’s possible she was alive when they took her?”
“Aye,” he said quietly. “It’s possible.”
I gasped. I’d expected subterfuge. Backpedaling. Question dodging. What I hadn’t expected was this honesty. Though that was the thing about Carden—he’d been honest with me from the start. Those times when there was something he couldn’t share, he’d simply tell me he couldn’t tell me. “What do you know?”
“I avoid Alcántara,” he said, “and for the moment, he leaves me be as well. But I do know this: If your friend once lived, surely she lives no longer. That is the only thing I can say with certainty.”
To have had such hope and then lose it again…I felt rudderless, at sea. I couldn’t begin to imagine what a wreck I’d be if it weren’t for Carden to lean on.
I told myself Emma was truly at peace. I thought it’d ease something in my mind, but instead it had the opposite effect. I needed to know what happened, exactly. What happened to all the girls. Exactly.
“But what…how—?” I couldn’t finish. Yasuo knew something. Something that plagued him. Something that haunted him so much he wanted me to pay for it.
Carden took my chin and tilted my face to his, peering deeply at me. “What more troubles you?”
I couldn’t explain about Yasuo, not completely. I wouldn’t put it past Carden to seek out and snap the necks of every Trainee who’d ever crossed me, and I wasn’t ready to give up on my friend yet. So instead I just shrugged.
“I must know,” he pressed. “Why this despair?”
“Why not despair?”
“Ah, but I have a thousand reasons why not.” He got that look in his eye—that hungry, wicked guy look that made my belly quiver. He brought his mouth a whisper away from mine, hovered for an exquisitely taut moment, then darted in to steal a hard, fast kiss. “There. That is one reason why not to despair. Shall I enumerate further?” He kissed along my cheek. “Work my way through the list?” He kissed the outer corner of one eye and then the other. “It’s a long one.”
His thousand possibilities exploded like a starburst in my mind, cascading down, setting my body alight, weakening my knees. I hadn’t known possibilities until Carden.
My skin buzzed. For now, all else was forgotten. I reached up, standing on tiptoe, stretching my body along his, ready to make our way down this mysterious list, when I heard a door open down the hall. I froze. It was probably just some girl going to the bathroom, but still, instinct was strong, and I held my breath, waiting for our Proctor—lovingly nicknamed Killer Kenzie—to come and bang on the door and flay me for having a guy in the room.
He read my mind. “There’s no need to fear when you’re with me.”
“But curfew.” I mouthed the words almost silently. Because, yeah, Kenzie was a Guidon and there probably wasn’t that much to fear from her where Carden was concerned. It was the other vampires I worried about. “It’s soon.”
“Aye.” He gently laced his fingers through the sensitive hair at the nape of my neck. “We have little time.” His other hand took my waist. It felt broad and sure. “I’ll not waste it.” He pulled me closer.