slider. A hook is a curve. There's also knuckleballs, split-finger fastballs, sinkers and palm balls."
"Don't forget spit balls," Henry said, stifling a burp under his breath.
"They're illegal," Kern said.
"Pitchers spit on the baseball?" I asked, wondering where the vulgarity of these Americans does indeed end.
"They're not supposed to," Nicole said, "but some guys not long ago made a living at it."
"Gaylord Perry," Kern added.
"But what possible effect might spitting on a baseball have?"
"A lot," Nicole said. "Maybe it's spit, maybe it's Vaseline, maybe it's God knows what. You get something embedded in the seams of the ball and it affects the air resistance. The ball'll do funny things, making it much harder to hit."
"Ah ha," I said, feeling a sudden burst of realization. "Friction is constantly at work here. Pitchers can achieve certain effects depending on how the ball spins. Correct?"
"Or depending on how it doesn't spin," Kern added. "A knuckleball ain't supposed to spin. That's what makes it break one way, then the other."
"Surface, you idiot," Henry snorted. "Don't you know dick about physics? If a knuckleball doesn't spin at all, it won't break. It'll just be a sitting duck. Ideally, a knuckleball will spin exactly one rotation between the pitcher's mound and the plate. Because the rotation's so slow, it'll break one way,then break back the other way."
A loud crack rang through the night, and the crowd groaned loudly. The batter had just gotten a hit and was now standing on first base. The pitcher stood straight this time, shook his head, glanced toward first base, glanced back toward the plate, shook his head again, then turned and threw to first base.
"He's trying to hold the runner," Nicole said, "to keep him from stealing second." She anticipated my next question. "Any time someone gets on base, they can attempt to reach the next base without the aid of a batted ball. The runner'll take off when the pitcher throws to the plate. If he makes it to the next base before getting tagged by whoever takes the catcher's throw, he's safe. That's what it means to steal a base."
Shake, glance, throw. Shake, glance, throw. A few minutes passed, and all that had happened was that the pitcher had still not agreed with the catcher on a pitch and had thrown to first base several times.
"Amazing that you Americans think soccer so boring." I did not intend to be overly provocative, but this game of throw and catch grew quickly tedious. At least in soccer, the ball always moves. Here, these ruffians seemed to be spending most of their time scratching their privates. "There seems to be nothing happening."
"And there never seems to be anything happening in a Jane Austen novel," Nicole said, "unless you read between the lines."
"I believe I have just been victimized by a vicious punster," I said, contemplating the white lines that formed the border of the playing area. "As you Americans say, I will bite. Tell me what it is I am missing. I am all ears."
"There's a lot of options here," Nicole began. "The guy on first is fast. He's very fast. Jenkins is - "
"Jenkins!" I exclaimed. "Where?"
"No," Kern said, "who'son first."
In a moment, my composure returned. No, my former investment manager was not playing minor league baseball.
"This guy, Jenkins, is real fast," Nicole continued, unfazed by the interruptions. "With his speed, he's a big threat to steal or take an extra base on a hit. So, the pitcher tries to keep him close by throwing to first repeatedly."
Nicole explained how a speedy base runner provides greater options for the batting team in its effort to move him closer to the eventual goal. She spoke of "bunts" and "steals" and something called "the hit-and-run." Somehow, it sounded dangerous, as well as a problem for the opposing team.
"Now, the defense is fully aware of all of this," Nicole continued. "They might call for a pitch-out. That's when the pitcher throws intentionally out of the strike zone where the batter can't hit it. The catcher can get to it and make a good, strong throw to second base, hopefully if the runner is running."
"Ah," I said, fighting a losing battle against confusion. "But the offense is aware of this preoccupation and may not let the runner run for fear of an oncoming pitch-out. Correct?"
"Yeah," Nicole replied, "but they also know the defense knows that the offense is well aware of the defense's awareness."