his swivel chair behind the little desk. The former necromancer and former golem sweatshop operator immediately expected the worst—which is not an inappropriate reaction from a man with a guilty conscience and a very long rap sheet.
“Now what have I done? I already made it up to that escaped golem. I’ve got good karma now, but I swear you people won’t rest in peace until you’ve destroyed my livelihood.”
“I’m not going to rest in peace anytime soon, Mr. Grubb.” I egged him on. “I’m puzzled by your reaction—worried about something?”
“No, no, I’ve walked the straight and narrow, I swear! I made amends wherever I could, and I sleep better at night, or during the day, or whenever it’s convenient. I took the second chance to heart. I listened to what you and Officer McGoohan said. I’m a changed man.”
His gaze shifted from side to side, but the eyeliner-painted third eye in the middle of his forehead stared directly at me. “Just like you said—I filled out every form, crossed every t, dotted every i, applied for every conceivable permit, paid fees that even the clerk didn’t know existed! I ransacked every single storage unit and spent hours with my clipboard, taking a complete inventory—and some of our customers were definitely not pleased. Kicked out a few homeless zombies, found a colony of feral black cats—talking ones, who were plotting to take over the world! Now, that was interesting. . . .”
I already knew that Max had filed his meticulous inventory of the storage units with the city clerk; Robin had obtained it through some legal somersault or other, and Sheyenne had pored over the listings until she spotted exactly what we were looking for.
He continued to ramble. “I properly disposed of any improperly stored items. I ensured legally mandated safety interlocks on all dangerous supernatural objects.” The former necromancer finally ran out of steam. “I’ve done nothing wrong.” He sniffled. “Honest.”
I decided not to reassure him; better to keep him nervous. “I’m investigating a storage unit that contains a large number of packaged hearts and souls. I need you to take me there.”
His eyes were bright and terrified, and even the painted eye on his forehead seemed to widen in fear. “I just knew those were going to be a problem! The clerk’s office didn’t know what to do with them. I think she wanted me to pay her a bribe to forget about the matter—but not me, no! Everything aboveboard from now on. That’s my promise.” Max sat up straight. “I spent hours with her looking through the books of regulations, and finally I got a permit for Dubious Sentimental Items. But I told her—I swear I told her—I said, ‘If this is the wrong category, call me back, and I’ll fill out the proper paperwork.’ I did think those combo packs were highly unusual. Why would somebody store them here?”
“I want to see these hearts and souls, Mr. Grubb.” From the pocket of my sport coat, I withdrew a thick folded document, an imposing and frighteningly legal-looking brief. “One of them belongs to a client of mine, and he will sue to get his soul back.” I looked around at the squalid offices. “Since you own the storage unit where the items in question have been hidden—perhaps illegally—you’ll be named as one of the parties in the lawsuit.”
Max held up his hands to ward off the document, like a vampire faced with a crucifix. That was fine with me, since I didn’t want him to read the papers anyway. The document was just Robin’s application for us to install a neon Chambeaux & Deyer sign outside our building, which had to be approved by the city council. The document had nothing whatsoever to do with retrieving the hearts and souls, but the former necromancer didn’t know that.
“No need! I’ll give you my full cooperation, but I’m not authorized to let you take any of the items away without a court order.”
“Right now, Mr. Grubb, my first duty is to make certain my client’s heart and soul are intact and undamaged.”
Max pecked away with two frantic, shaking fingers on his old, dusty PC, calling up the records. “Yes, yes, there’s the unit. It was rented by a Ms. Angela Drake, paid two years in advance.” He looked up with a small forced smile. “She got a free month that way.”
“I already know who rented it. Now please, take me out there so I can verify that my client’s heart