The Unkindest Tide (October Daye #13) - Seanan McGuire Page 0,2

Choice, and then the false Queen and the Luidaeg had taken that away from her, one out of malice and one out of mercy, and I had to wonder whether she’d ever forgive any of us.

I haven’t spoken to her since the day she woke up and realized her life had changed forever. I promised to give her whatever space she needed, to let her be the one to come to me. But really, I don’t know what to say. “I’m sorry I saved your life” is a lie. So is “It’s better to be fae.” And “I didn’t want this for you” just might be the biggest lie of all. Of course, I wanted this—or something like it. She’s my daughter. I want her with me.

But I’m not the mother she reaches for when she’s scared, or lost, or lonely. That honor goes to my own grandmother, Janet Carter, who stepped in and raised my child when Faerie conspired to take me away from her for fourteen years.

Sometimes I hate my biological family. Maybe that’s why I’ve worked so hard to build myself a new one.

It was simultaneously late enough and early enough that traffic was light. The Market District was closed for the evening, sending its burden of businesspeople and their support staff scurrying back to their safe, secure homes, while the bars and clubs downtown had yet to hit their full swing. I passed Dolores Park and pulled into the driveway of my old Victorian-style house in nearly record time. The kitchen lights were on. I turned off the car, opened the door, and was accosted by the sound of classic rock blasting through the open window. May was singing along as Journey asserted the need to continue to believe. May, like me, can’t carry a tune in a bucket. The effect was surprisingly charming. It said “you’re safe here.” It said “nothing is currently wrong.”

It said “welcome home.”

Since there were people home, the wards weren’t set; all I needed to get inside was my key. I stepped into the warm, bright kitchen, where my Fetch was dancing in front of the counter as she mixed a bowl of cookie dough. She turned and grinned at me.

“I hope you got extra burritos,” she said. “We have extra mouths in residence.”

I raised an eyebrow. “How many?”

“Dean and Raj.”

I raised the other eyebrow. “Raj got away for the evening?”

May nodded. “Uh-huh. Gin told him part of kingship is being able to delegate every once in a while, so he’s our problem until midnight. That’s why I’m baking cookies. They’re working that poor boy to the bone.”

“That poor boy is going to be King of Cats; he signed up for this.” I swiped a fingerful of cookie dough as I headed for the hall. May laughed and hit me with her mixing spoon, getting more dough on my wrist. I grinned and kept walking, sticking my wrist in my mouth to suck off the sugary goodness.

As my Fetch—technically retired, since Amandine broke the connection between us when she changed the balance of my blood to save my life—May and I used to be identical. Now, years and quests and changes later, we still look like sisters, but we’re not twins anymore. Her face is the one I had when she was called into existence, soft and round and human in ways my own face has forgotten. Her eyes are a pale, misty gray, and her hair is the no-color brown that drives a thousand salon appointments, a color she’s constantly at war with, covering it in streaks of blue and green and purple and, most recently, flaming orange. It makes her happy, and I like it when she’s happy. After all, she’s my sister in every way that counts.

Her live-in girlfriend, Jazz, was in the dining room, sitting at the table and clipping coupons out of an advertising circular. She tensed and looked up at the sound of my footsteps, golden eyes briefly widening before she relaxed and offered me a somewhat weary smile. “Hey, Toby,” she said. “Need me to move?”

“Up to you.” I held up the bag of burritos. “As soon as I crinkle the foil, we’re going to have an invasion of teenage boys. Salsa may fly. Your coupons could get royally wrecked.”

“Yes, but I’ll have salsa, so I’ll live.”

I watched her gather her coupons as I set my bag down and unpacked its contents. Fortunately for my ability to eat my own dinner, I always make