The Unexpected Everything - Morgan Matson Page 0,155

her as a kind of a peace offering and hope she’d forgive me, so that we could start to sort this out. Because the longer my phone stayed silent, the longer there was no communication on our group text, the more worried I was getting. Toby and Bri were both equally stubborn, and I didn’t want to know what would happen if more than a few days of this standoff went on. I was afraid that at some point this would just become our reality. This had to change, and I knew I couldn’t do it without Palmer, especially since Toby wasn’t mad at her, as far as I knew.

But now, standing at the very back of the theater, looking at Palmer sitting at her stage manager’s table, her bright hair glowing in the dimness of the room, I was starting to get nervous about my plan. I ran my thumb over the condensation on my cup as I walked down the aisle to the row where her table was set up, telling myself not to be ridiculous. This was Palmer. I shouldn’t be nervous about talking to Palmer. But that didn’t change the fact that I was.

I hesitated at the end of her row, shifting my weight from foot to foot, waiting for her to notice I was there. But her eyes were fixed on the stage, where Tom was being yelled at by the actress playing Camp Director Arnold. I walked down the row, hesitating for a second before taking a seat next to her and placing her drink in front of her. “Hi,” I whispered.

“Ready follow spot forty-seven,” Palmer said, but under her breath, like she was saying it to herself. “Forty-seven, go.” She looked over at me, then turned to face the stage again.

“Palmer,” I said, leaning forward so that I would be in her line of vision. “Come on.”

“Ready sound forty-eight,” she said, half under her breath, her eyes moving between the stage and the marked-up script in front of her, making tiny check marks with a pencil. “Forty-eight, go.”

“Hold!” The bearded director stood up and started making his way to the stage, shaking his head as Tom and the actress moved downstage to talk to him.

Palmer looked over at me, then sighed and put her pencil down. “I can’t really talk,” she said. “I’m practicing calling the show.” She looked at the drink in front of her, and it was like I could practically sense her struggle before she picked it up and took a sip.

I took a sip of my own, to give me some courage, then blurted out, “I’m so sorry, Palmer.”

She looked back at the stage, where the director was now standing next to Tom, gesturing big, while Tom nodded and scribbled notes in his script. “What are you sorry about?” she asked, not looking at me. “That you lied to me about what was happening with Bri and Wyatt? That you asked my boyfriend to keep lying to me?”

“You don’t think I wanted to tell you?”

“But you told Clark,” Palmer said, looking at me evenly.

“I did,” I said quietly, knowing there was no way out of this. “But we have to fix this, P.”

“Yeah,” Palmer said quietly, reaching for her drink but just holding it for a moment and rolling it between her palms. “But I don’t know if we can.”

I sat back in my seat. This was what I’d been worried about, when I’d even allowed myself to go there. But hearing her say it was something else. The fact that she wasn’t seeing the best and looking on the bright side was almost more than I could take.

“What are you saying?” I asked, my voice coming out unsteady. “That we’re all just done? Friendship over?”

She took a long drink and then set her cup back down. “I don’t know.”

“Okay!” the director yelled, walking back down to the auditorium from the stage. “We’re picking it up from Duncan’s line, people. Let’s go!”

“I have to do this,” Palmer said, picking up her pencil again and flipping a few pages back in her script binder.

I nodded and shouldered my bag but didn’t leave yet. I still didn’t know where we stood, and the thought of leaving with things so unsettled was making me feel panicky. “So,” I started, then hesitated. “Are we okay?”

Palmer looked over at me for a moment before looking back at the stage. “I’m not sure,” she finally said.

I nodded, swallowing hard. “Okay,” I said as I stood