He stares back into my eyes, but his gaze quickly falls to my lips. I’m trembling.
But before I can say how I feel, Parker’s lips crush against mine, his body pinning mine to the floor. He’s on top of me, and he’s kissing me hard, the stiffness between his legs demanding more, right now. I lay there in shock, my mouth partially open, my eyes boring into his. But he doesn’t even notice. He’s too caught up in the moment, groaning against my lips as he steals more kisses from my lips.
I lie on the floor. Parker’s lips are hot, his tongue exploring my mouth.
And I feel …
Nothing.
It’s just as crazy. Just as forbidden. Just as wrong.
They’re both my brothers. But I only love one of them.
I let Parker kiss me until he’s had enough, and he rolls on his back next to me, his hand finding mine. I let him murmur sweet nothings into my ear, and I nod and smile in all the right places. But on the inside, I’m more broken than ever before. I may have let Parker kiss me… I may have let him touch me… But there wasn’t one second, one moment while we kissed, that I didn’t wish those hands he touched me with were his brother’s.
I’m rushing to work the next day. My driver stopped a few blocks away because the traffic was insane, and at this exact moment, I’m cursing every driver in the city as I stumble toward the building in my too-high heels. Damn appearances and having to look perfect every damn second of the day.
“June.”
One word. One name. It stops me in my tracks, and I turn around, wobbling on my shaky feet. He comes out of a side alley, his hands deep in the pockets of that navy peacoat he always wears. His head is down, his eyes hooded with tiredness, sadness, and God knows what else. But I see right past all of that. I see my Kade.
The man who loved me like a sister, and like a woman as well. The man who made love to me. The man who fucked me over. I whimper and cover it up with a cough because he’s everything, and I am nothing, and I can’t form coherent sentences in his presence.
“Can we talk?” Kade asks in a husky voice. And even though all my senses yell at me to say no, even though I know it’s a bad idea, I find myself nodding.
We settle in a booth at a coffee place not far away from my workplace, and we order some drinks. I'm missing work, but I find it hard to care about anything except the man sitting at the table with me. I order a chai latte because I can’t picture eating anything in his presence. Even opening my mouth to order the drink seems to be giving me trouble. Kade is silent as he drinks his tea, and my glass just sits steaming in front of me. All I can do is stare at him in wonder. I don’t know why he even wants to talk—he hasn’t said a word since we got here.
“So?” I ask impatiently, my words sounding harsher than I mean them to. He flinches, and it hurts. It hurts so bad, yet I can’t make it better. Only he can do that.
He finally looks at me. “I came to give you something.”
“Yes?” I ask, holding my breath, my hands crossed in my lap. He pulls his own hands out of his pockets and I fully expect him to reach over for me. But instead, he pulls out a thick envelope and places it on the table in front of me.
I look down, feeling confused. “What’s that?” I wonder.
“It’s for you.” He motions for me to take it. I do as he suggests and peek inside the brown paper. There’s money in there. Quite a bit of it.
“What is this?” I ask, feeling confused. Kade refuses to meet my eye again.
“I know you’re taking care of Parker,” he says roughly. “That’s… that’s all I have.” He must feel my uncertainty because he clears up what he meant with his next words. “Money for him,” he says. “To take care of my brother.”
I look at Kade, and for the first time that day, I realize he looks like shit. His eyes are tired, and there’s the faint mark of a bruise on one, the remains of a lip split broken still swelling his mouth.