stoicism. The losses would be worth the victory, and nothing short of victory was acceptable.
It was all a reflection of her father, Catti-brie realized. Everything from Torgar's decision to leave Mirabar to Citadel Felbarr's bold, if ill-advised, attempt to cross the river was due in part to the character of Bruenor Battlehammer.
Catti-brie could only smile as she looked upon her dear father.
Eventually, her gaze went across the dais to Banak, lying more than sitting, propped in a carriage the woman feared would soon become his prison. He had given his body for the cause - even the optimistic Cordio doubted that the dwarf would ever walk again - and yet there he was, cheering and drinking and with a bright smile gleaming out from between the whiskers of his hairy old face.
It was a good day to be a Battlehammer, Catti-brie decided. Despite the tragedy in the eastern breakout and their precarious position between Mithral Hall and the Surbrin, despite the horde of orcs pressing in on them from every side and the terrible losses they all had suffered, friends and kin forever lost, it was a good day to be a Battlehammer.
She believed that with all her heart, and yet was not surprised at the feel of a teardrop running down her soft cheek.
For Catti-brie had come to doubt.
She had lost Drizzt, she believed, and only in that realization did the woman finally admit it all to herself. That she had loved him above all others. That he alone had made her whole and made her happy. So many problems had come between them, issues of longevity and children, and of the perceptions of others - there it was, all before her and hopelessly lost. All those imagined ills seemed so foolish, seemed the petty workings of confusion and self-destruction. When Catti-brie had been down on the ground and surrounded by goblins, when she had thought her life at its end, she had found an emptiness beyond anything she had ever imagined possible. The realization of her mortality had sent her thoughts careening along the notions of things that should have been. Lost in that jumble, she had pushed Drizzt away. Lost in that jumble, Catti-brie had forgotten that the future isn't a straight road purposely designed by the traveler. The future is made of the actions of the present, each and every one, the choices of the moment inadvertently strung together to produce the desired trail. To live each and every day in the best possible manner would afford her a life without regret, and a life without regret was the key to an acceptance of inevitable death.
And now Drizzt was lost to her.
In all her life, would Catti-brie ever heal that wound?
"Are you all right?"
Wulfgar's voice was soft and full of concern, and she looked up to see his blue eyes staring back at her.
"It's been a difficult time," she admitted.
"So many dead."
"Or missing."
The look on Wulfgar's face told her that he understood the reference. "We are able to go out again," he said, "and so we must hope that Drizzt will be able to come in."
She didn't blink.
"And if not, then we will go find him. You and I, Bruenor and Regis," the big man declared. "Perhaps we will even convince Ivan and Pikel to join in the hunt - the strange one talks to birds, you know. And birds can see all the land."
She still didn't blink.
"We will find him," Wulfgar promised.
Another cheer rose up in the hall, and Bruenor called upon Torgar to come forth and give a proper speech about it all. "Tell us what bringed ye here," the dwarf king prompted. "Tell us all yer journeys."
Wulfgar's grin disappeared as soon as he looked back at Catti-brie, for her expression was no less distant and detached, and no less full of pain.
"Do you need to leave?" he asked.
"I'm weary to the bone," she answered.
With great effort, the woman pulled herself out of her chair and leaned heavily on the crutch Cordio had made for her. She began to take a shuffling step forward, but Wulfgar caught hold of her. With a simple and effortless movement, the large man swept her into his arms.
"Where're ye going, then?" Bruenor asked from the dais. Before him, Torgar was giving his account to a thoroughly engaged audience.
"I'm needing a bit of rest, is all," said Catti-brie.
Bruenor held a concerned look for a few moments, then nodded and turned back to Torgar.