let out a wail that carried over the graveyard, a lament that even I could feel in my black heart. Gemma shook against me then she too stumbled to the grave and fell to her knees beside her mother, clutching her tightly. Diego was frozen.
I’d never encountered grief this raw. My eyes slanted to my brothers. Nino had his arm wrapped around Kiara, who was bawling. Remo’s expression was the fiercest I’d ever seen it, as he gripped Serafina’s hand. She, too, was crying but in her proud, dignified way. In the past, it had only been my brothers and I. We had little to lose, except for each other, but now the number of people we cared about and had sworn to protect grew every year, and it would keep growing. I looked at Gemma.
My brothers had embraced their new responsibilities, and I would too.
I gave Gemma a few days after the funeral before I asked her if I could come over. We had our wedding to plan. Life needed to go on. It was easy to get lost in your grief, but I didn’t want that for Gemma.
She was in sweatpants and a T-shirt when I got there.
The house was strangely quiet with her mom and sister over at their aunt’s. Only Diego and Gemma lived in the house now, and Diego had become awfully quiet.
She let me in but kept her distance. I’d suspected that the two kisses we’d shared had been the result of her broken-heartedness.
We sank down on the sofa and she regarded me with a quiet scrutiny that made me nervous. “Are you still sure about marrying me in six weeks?”
I laughed. “Kiara’s already halfway done with the planning. She’d have my balls if I canceled the thing now.”
Gemma didn’t crack a smile. “I’m being serious.”
Sighing, I took her hand. “I’m sure about marrying you. I’ll probably be a lousy husband, but I’ll do my best.”
She swallowed. “I want you to be faithful to me. I want you to be only mine like I’m only yours.”
“I will be faithful.”
“You will be. So, until our wedding, you’re going to keep seeing other girls?”
I released a breath. “I haven’t been with another girl in two weeks.” Since I almost lost her and realized I couldn’t bear the thought.
“Congrats,” she said, her lips thinning.
“What do you want to hear, Gem? It’s the longest I’ve gone without sex since I lost my V-card at thirteen.”
“And the wait is going to be even longer, are you sure your bull can handle it?”
I hid a smile at her feistiness. I preferred it to her grief. “He’ll be fine. Six weeks will pass in no time.” It would be hard, of course, especially my poor dick. Just the thought of only having my hand for relief, nearly brought tears to my eyes.
“Six weeks?” Gemma echoed.
“Until our wedding, or did you reconsider the waiting until marriage thing?” I had to tease her, I couldn’t help it.
“Definitely not,” she said with a strange smile.
Our house had become horribly empty and quiet. I even missed Nonna’s disapproving cluck. I shoved the thought aside before grief could overwhelm me again. Four weeks had passed since their death, but sometimes it still felt like yesterday. Carlotta was still in the hospital after her surgery, but she was recovering quickly and would most likely be able to attend the wedding at the end of August.
It was still strange thinking that I’d really marry Savio in four weeks. For a while, I hadn’t been sure that would happen at all. Toni picked Mom and me up in her car because neither of us had a license. Now that Dad wasn’t there anymore, Mom had decided to learn how to drive, but so far, she’d been busy taking care of Carlotta. I, too, would start driving lessons after my wedding. There was still too much to do until then. Not to mention that I already had a license, thanks to my affiliation to a certain Falcone clan. No police officer in their right mind would give me a ticket once my last name was Falcone, but I still wanted to actually learn how to steer a car.
When Toni, Mom, and I stepped into the most expensive bridal store of Las Vegas, my heart seemed to be torn in two. On the one hand, I was excited to choose my wedding dress, something I’d dreamed of since I was a little girl, on the other hand, I felt horrible every