shackle it again.” Leaning closer, she whispered, “I don’t know about you, but sex is a huge part of me now. I can’t go a day without an orgasm.”
I gasped, not entirely comfortable with such honest conversation.
She laughed softly. “You’re telling me you haven’t…you know?” Her eyebrows wiggled. “Acted on that persistent craving in your blood?”
I arched my chin, ready to deny any attempt at self-release, but my shoulders sagged. If I couldn’t be truthful with a fellow goddess—the only one I’d find a confidant in, according to Sully—who could I? It wasn’t like I could ever speak of my experiences back at home. I would hoard my secrets from Scott until I died. While I was here, I was expected to be a wanton creature—which was good because…I couldn’t help it.
Not after ingesting elixir twice. Not after living in a heightened state of sensitivity, waiting for Sully to appear, disappointed when he didn’t, disappointed in myself that I was disappointed.
It’s exhausting.
She laughed again, taking my hand and guiding me to her table. She pushed me into the chair next to the one she’d abandoned, her hazel eyes twinkling. “So…”
I sagged. “I can’t stop the dreams. They’re far too intense.”
“I know. I always have very explicit dreams after Euphoria.”
“Do they stop?”
“Yes.” She grinned. “But by the time they stop, you’re summoned to fulfil another fantasy.” She pushed her bowl away. “Around and around we go.”
“Great.” I rolled my eyes.
“What do you dream about?”
I stiffened. That was one thing I wouldn’t divulge because I didn’t like what that made me. It made me one of them. The other goddesses currently glowering at me from across the deck, the girls in lust with Sully.
“Do you dream about him?” Jealousy whispered, very aware the other girls had fallen suspiciously quiet and watched us closely.
Another blush scalded my cheeks. I could lie but the truth was crimson on my face. “I don’t want to.”
She patted my hand. “I know. It’s not your fault that your mind disobeys.”
“I should dream about my boyfriend.”
“You can dream about anyone you want. That’s the beauty of a dream…you’re not hurting anyone.”
I dropped my gaze, wincing against the sudden pain in my chest. “I’m hurting myself.”
“Maybe, but only because something inside you senses something inside him.” She reclined in her chair, still keeping her voice low. “You can’t help it if something’s going on between you two.” Flicking a glance at the other goddesses, she murmured, “You should’ve seen him when he came out of the bathroom. He looked as if he’d tear the room apart. I’ve never seen him that…hungry.”
I froze. “You saw him? After…after—”
He kissed me.
Do I dare say it?
Was it worth the risk or guaranteed suicide?
She waited for me to continue, her gaze steady and clear. She was either the best actress in the world, hiding her pettiness and envy, or she honestly had no feelings for our overseer.
“What happened in there?” Her question ached with secrecy, a sisterhood that made me weak and protected at the same time.
“I…he…” I licked my lips, trying to figure out how to tell her that a single kiss had shattered me, woken me up, and shoved me headfirst into the possibility that Sully might not just be a nightmarish part of my life that I had to endure but a fundamental piece to fix it. That in a single heartbeat, I’d felt more wanted, more devoured, more powerful than ever before. That something had happened past lust and longing…something that would not only destroy me but ruin Sully too.
“I don’t think we’ve been introduced.”
I wrenched my gaze from Jealousy’s, hating that our nucleus of confessions had been rudely popped. A girl from the beach the other night, Jupiter or Neptune, I couldn’t remember which, leered down, her hip cocked, her see-through kimono revealing a willowy, sexy body clad in a golden one piece that made her voluptuous attributes seem as if they were poured from priceless metal.
“Nep, this is Jinx.” Jealousy leaned back in her chair, a trace of irritation bracketing her mouth. “Jinx, this is Neptune, Jupiter, Calico, and Jewel.”
The four women who’d traded their table to loom over ours smiled thin, judgy grins. As four, they chanted, “Hello, Goddess Jinx.”
I nodded politely. “Hello.”
The chocolate-skinned one, Calico, came closer, eyeing me up. Her initial stare smouldered with aggression, but then a smug smile tugged her lips, her judgement slipping into manipulation.
She didn’t see me as a threat. Didn’t think little ole me with my long boring brown hair