Truly, Madly, Deeply (The Baxters #31) - Karen Kingsbury Page 0,71
through. “God never stops loving us. I’m seeing that more and more.” Reagan dried another pan and set it on the counter.
“Definitely.” Ashley finished washing the last serving platter and turned to Reagan. “How are you doing? With the whole police thing?”
“I still don’t like it. If I’m honest.” The fear that had plagued Reagan was easing. In the daytime, at least. “But I understand his decision better. Getting to see Officer Raul with his family and friends after he came home was important. It changed things for me.” She dried the platter and the two poured coffees and took them to the kitchen table.
“You texted me that Officer Raul told you something that night?” Ashley leaned back and sighed. “You never said what it was.”
“He reminded me of a truth I’d forgotten. He told me God has the number of our days.” She uttered a sad laugh. “Worry won’t help. Being terrified about a decision Tommy might make or… something any of our kids might do—there’s no point in that.”
“I remember finding peace with that truth.” Ashley leaned forward. “After Cole had that choking incident. Remember?”
Reagan nodded. “Of course.” The tension that night had been terrible. Ashley was still figuring out life as a single mother to baby Cole, and she and Luke had been fighting. “Luke left a bottle cap on Cole’s high chair tray, right?”
“That’s it.” Ashley tilted her head and looked up at the ceiling for a minute. “So terrifying.” She looked at Reagan again. “If Landon hadn’t been here to do the Heimlich on him, I’m pretty sure… I don’t know.”
Reagan set her coffee down. “You dealt with your fear of being a mom after that?”
Ashley laughed. “Not like it was one-and-done. Not hardly.” She hesitated. “But I remember thinking a few things. First… I had to be more careful.”
“Don’t we all.” Reagan remembered the way she’d come unglued that first night when Tommy told them he wanted to be a cop.
“But also, there’s only so much we can do.” Ashley blew on her coffee and took a sip. “The only day ever promised to any of us is… well, today.”
It was the exact lesson Reagan had been learning. “I have a story I want to tell Tommy, something my mom shared with me on the anniversary of 9/11. About my dad’s death.” Reagan folded her hands in her lap. “But I’m holding back.”
“How come?”
Suddenly from the other room, Luke and Landon each let out a loud cheer. “That’s my Lions!” They heard Landon clap a few times. “Gotta love Thanksgiving Day football!”
Reagan and Ashley laughed. “See?” Ashley shook her head. “We have no idea what tomorrow brings. Not for Annalee or Tommy… or any of us. But today?” She pointed toward the family room. “Today we laugh and clap and cheer. We celebrate because this day—this one special day—will never come again.” Ashley’s eyes lit up. “Same with that special day coming up a few weeks from now! Sounds like everyone’s joining in on the surprise.”
“I can’t wait.” Reagan smiled. But for now they had this day. This single moment.
Again they were quiet for a long minute, catching their breath from the day. Ashley set her coffee cup down. “Why are you holding back? About the latest details of your dad’s death?”
“I guess… I’m afraid they’ll make Tommy even more sure about being a cop.”
Ashley raised one eyebrow. “From the sounds of what he said at dinner, I’d say he’s already pretty sure.”
“I know.” Reagan was still wrestling with this part, when to tell Tommy. “He deserves to know.”
For the next ten minutes Reagan told Ashley what she had learned that day and how it had changed everything about the way she viewed her father’s final hour. In the years since the terrorist attacks, Reagan had often wished she’d known how little time she had left with her dad. Had she known, she would’ve taken the semester off school so they could’ve made a thousand memories together.
But now—in light of what God was doing in her heart and in view of her conversations with Raul and Ashley—Reagan wasn’t as sure. If she had known, she would’ve spent her final time with her father worrying. Terrified about what was going to happen. And she wouldn’t have gotten pregnant with Tommy, so she wouldn’t be married to Luke. At least it seemed that way. All of which lent credence to the truth Raul had shared with her.
God knew the number of their days.
Because Tommy was almost