The Tracker Hive Academy Year One - Avery Song Page 0,83

situation like this was beyond frightening.

Maybe I was crying because I was by Zeus and hadn’t discussed my problems with him. Sure, he knew I worried about hallucinations, but I hadn't openly said, ‘I have this problem’ like I had with Zeke.

Or how I'd admitted the problem to Zion for the sake of the assessment.

Zeus’s anger forced me to recognize what I almost did. To confront that I'd almost hurt myself.

Something I hadn't done since...well, since my homeless and recovery years.

"I-I'm sorry," I immediately apologized, wishing I could step away from him and hide. His obvious anger made me feel like I was the little Jade who'd woken up to Shadow Jade's destructive mess.

"It...it wasn't..." I struggled to defend myself, reliving that man's voice in my head, telling me what a liar I was.

That I should own up to my actions. Yet...this wasn't mine. Just like before...back then.

"Jade," Zeus said my name again. "Did your watch go off?"

I swallowed the lump in my throat, ignoring how my body shook from the cold water and the fear rushing through me.

What would telling him achieve?

I was more concerned that he was standing in the chilled water with me. His entire body was drenched. I noticed he wasn't wearing his shirt and he had a cut on the side of his neck.

When did he get that?

"Jade."

"Y-yes," I answered, trying to stay focused. "Yes."

I tried to catch my breath, or maybe I was aiming not to panic entirely. It was hard when I felt like I was freezing to death in a closed bubble and not in the open room full of showers.

"Fuck," he muttered.

"I-I-I'm sorry, Z-Zeus," I stuttered as I fought for breath.

He cursed again but immediately wrapped me in his arms. "Breathe, Jade."

I clung to him, shivering uncontrollably. The shower turned off, and within seconds, I was warmer. He walked us to the bench between the lockers, sitting down and cradling me in his arms as I kept apologizing.

"Jade. Stop apologizing. It wasn't you." He kept saying those words over and over, rocking me like a child who was crying after falling down and getting hurt.

It took time for me to calm down from what surely was a panic attack. I rested my head against Zeus's chest, noticing how warm he was. I hadn't even realized I wasn't drenched anymore until now, and even the towel around my body was toasty warm.

"Zeus?"

I leaned back to see his eyes were now a mix of gold and amber. He didn't look as angry as before, but he wasn't pleased either.

"You're not allowed to be alone anymore," he declared.

"Taking away my human rights is selfish," I muttered, unable to stop myself from saying it.

Yes. I'd just tried to kill myself, but I wasn't going on the Maxwell's twenty-four-hour monitor plan.

"I'm not joking, Jade."

"I never said you were. I don't need you guys to do a twenty-four watch. If I did, I'd voluntarily enter a psych ward."

Lifting my right wrist, I now noticed the bandage on it. I had to blink a few times, wondering when he'd put it on my wrist. With a long sigh, I closed my eyes.

"Sorry," I whispered. "I should thank you but I'm being a bitch."

"You're not a bitch," he grumbled. "The others are coming."

"Then I should put actual clothes on," I replied sarcastically, getting off his lap and rising up to my shaky feet. "I'll be fast. You can wait outside."

Walking to the next locker row where my locker was, I reached it and tried to open the lock but my right hand was shaking again. Lowering my hand, I tried my left, but it wasn't any better.

"You seriously hate people helping you," Zeus muttered.

I realized he was behind me again.

"I don't need it."

"You were just controlled to try and kill yourself, had a full-blown panic attack, and now you're trying to act like everything is okay."

My fingers fumbled with the lock again, but it was like I couldn’t even recall the simple combination with how frantic my mind was.

"You don't know that. I could have had a dumb hallucination, tried to kill myself because of it, had a panic attack for the thrill, and now be trying to remember what my stupid combo is," I argued.

Zeus let out a harsh exhale, moving to help me. I turned around and pressed my back against my locker. "I don't need your help."

"Why do you resist others caring about you?!"

"Help means favors. No one in this damn world does anything without wanting