Til Death Do Us Part (Kornilov Bratva Duet #2) - Nicole Fox Page 0,48
you aren’t,” he says sharply. “Not really. We aren’t married.”
The words feel like a slap to the face, and I bite down on my reaction, trying to remain just as cold as he is. It is clear something happened to upset Viktor, and now he is taking it out on me, trying to pick a fight.
“Whether it’s real or not, it feels real,” I snap. “The pregnancy was an accident and the wedding was fake, but we are still a team. We still have a life together, and I deserve to know what is going on with you.”
Viktor has stilled beneath my touch, and I realize all at once what I’ve just admitted to.
“It’s real for you?” Viktor whispers.
I don’t answer and instead slap a bandage over his wound and rush out of the bathroom and back into the living room where Theo is coloring.
A minute later, Viktor follows me.
“Molly,” he says sternly, but with a hint of gentleness.
“Theo wanted to show you his picture.” Theo jumps up and holds up his drawing to Viktor, and I’m not at all ashamed of using my son as a shield.
I’m not ready for this conversation. I’m not ready to admit my feelings to Viktor because I still don’t understand them. I don’t understand what they mean for me or my children or our future. Everything is up in the air, and I don’t want to make any commitments that I can’t keep.
Viktor admires Theo’s drawing and pats his head, commissioning Theo to draw him a purple dinosaur blowing green fire. Theo, a born businessman, requests payment in the form of one piece of chocolate from the candy drawer in the kitchen.
“Don’t undersell yourself,” Viktor says. “You can have two pieces of chocolate.”
With the promise of candy, Theo sets to work drawing the best dinosaur he can, and Viktor grabs my hand and pulls me far enough away that Theo can’t hear us.
“Did you mean that?” he asks.
My shoulders droop forward, and I place my face in my hands. “I’m tired, Viktor. It has been a long day. Can we just—?”
“No, we can’t.” Viktor slides his hand from my elbow to my shoulder and squeezes. “Talk to me.”
“Talk to me,” I repeat back to him, my words shrill and slightly frantic. “Tell me the truth.”
“I am telling you the truth,” Viktor says, lowering his face to look into my eyes. “Nothing out of the ordinary happened today. These cuts and bruises and scrapes are my normal life, and I promise you, I’d tell you if something beyond the normal happened.”
“You promise?”
He nods. “I swear it. We are a team.”
My words sound different coming out of his mouth. And they land like physical blows.
“I shouldn’t have said that.”
His brows pull together and there is hurt in his blue eyes. “Why not? Did you mean it?”
I want to lie to him and tell him it was a mistake. I misspoke and I take it all back. But I can’t.
“Yes, I meant it,” I admit, twisting out of his touch. I can’t think straight with him that close to me. It is why I slipped up in the bathroom in the first place. Having his naked chest two inches from my face makes me a bumbling idiot. “But the way I feel doesn’t change the facts.”
“It sure as hell does for me,” Viktor says, putting himself in my line of sight again. “How does that not change things? If you care about me the way I care for you, then—”
“Then we’ll be safe?” I ask, hating how harsh the question sounds. “Then you suddenly won’t have any more enemies and my kids will be protected?”
Viktor stares at me, the lines in his face becoming more pronounced as frustration mounts inside of him. The same frustration that is building inside of me.
“See?” I throw up my hands in defeat. “It doesn’t matter. This life is too dangerous for my kids, and I won’t risk their safety for my feelings. I just … I won’t do it, Viktor.”
He clenches his jaw, making it even more square than normal, and I resist the urge to reach out and massage his cheek. I want to be the person who eases Viktor’s burdens. Like Seamus and Niamh, I want to be the person who stands by his side and makes this life easier to bear. I want to take his weight and carry it like my own, and I want to give him some of mine.