get to. It was fun. The players would wear our color. Father preferred blue and Mother, green. I think you were red that day, Kadam, and I was yellow.”
“Where was Ren?”
Kishan picked up a piece and twirled it thoughtfully. “He was off on a diplomatic trip at that time, so Kadam subbed for him.”
Mr. Kadam cleared his throat, “A-hem, yes. If the two of you don’t mind, I would prefer to be red again, as the color brought me luck last time I played.”
Kishan spun the board so the red color was in front of Mr. Kadam. I picked yellow; Kishan, blue. We played for an hour. I’d never seen Kishan so animated. He almost seemed like a young boy again, with all the cares of the world lifted off his shoulders. I could easily envision this proud, handsome, taciturn man as a happy, carefree boy who grew up to stand in the shadow of his older brother, loving and admiring him, but at the same time feeling that he was somehow less important. Somehow less deserving. By the end of the game, Kishan and I had left Mr. Kadam in the dust. There was only one pawn left for each of us, and mine was closer to home.
On the last roll, Kishan could have knocked me out to win the game. He stared at the board for a moment studying it carefully.
Mr. Kadam’s steepled fingers were tapping his upper lip, which was turned up in a small smile. Kishan’s golden eyes met mine briefly before he picked up his pawn and skipped over mine, moving into a safety zone.
“Kishan, what are you doing? You could have gotten me out and won the game! Didn’t you see that?”
He sat back in his chair and shrugged. “Huh, I must’ve missed that. Your turn, Kelsey.”
I muttered, “It’s totally impossible that you missed that. Okay. Then too bad for you.” I rolled a twelve and made it all the way home. “Ha! I beat the two infamous live-version players!”
Mr. Kadam laughed. “Indeed you did, Miss Kelsey. Goodnight.”
“Goodnight, Mr. Kadam.”
Kishan helped me clean up the game.
I said, “Okay, so ’fess up. Why’d you throw the game? You’re not a good bluffer, you know. I could read your expression. You saw the move and deliberately skipped over me. What happened to doing whatever it takes to win?”
“I still do whatever it takes to win. Perhaps by losing the game, I won something better.”
I laughed. “Won something better? What do you think you won?”
He pushed the game to the side of the table and stretched his hand across to hold mine. “What I won was seeing you happy, happy like you were. I want to see your smile come back. You smile and laugh, but it never reaches your eyes. I haven’t seen you really happy these last few months.”
I squeezed his hand. “It’s hard. But, if Kishan, the ultimate competitor, is willing to throw a game, then, for you, I’ll try.”
“Good.” He let go of my hand reluctantly and stood up to stretch.
I set the game on the shelf and said, “Kishan, I keep having nightmares about Ren. I think Lokesh is torturing him.”
“I’ve been dreaming of Ren as well. I’ve dreamed that he begs me to keep you safe.” He grinned. “He also threatens me to keep my hands to myself.”
“He’d definitely be saying that. Do you think it’s a dream or a true vision?”
He shook his head. “I don’t know.”
I pressed my hands on top of the game. “Every time I try to save him or help him escape, he pushes me away as if I’m the one in danger. It feels real, but how do we know?”
Kishan wrapped his arms around me from behind and hugged me. “I’m not sure, but I do feel he’s still alive.”
“I feel the same.” He turned to leave. “Kishan?”
“Yes?”
I grinned. “Thanks for letting me win. And for keeping your hands to yourself. Mostly.”
“Ah, but you forget, this is just one battle. The war is far from over, and you will find that I make a formidable opponent. In any arena.”
“Fine,” I offered. “Then it’s a rematch. Tomorrow.”
He bowed slightly. “I look forward to the challenge, bilauta. Goodnight.”
“Goodnight, Kishan.”
The next day at breakfast, I picked Mr. Kadam’s brain about the Dalai Lama, Buddhism, karma, and reincarnation. Kishan quietly listened while curled up at my feet as the black tiger.
“You see, Miss Kelsey, karma is the belief that everything you do, everything you say, every choice that you