Tell Me - Ashe Barker Page 0,21
Sir, definitely not.” She shook her head, emphasising her denial. “I wanted this. You. I’ve known that, almost from the first time we scened together. I just didn't think it was possible though. Not and keep my other self, my real-life self, separate.”
“This, you and me, is real life too, Thea.”
“Yes, I know that. But it's different. I wouldn’t want people I work with to know that I love to be whipped. Or that I like having a plug in my arse. Or, well, everything really.”
Tony laughed out loud, delighted with her frankness. “Shit, neither would I. That would cause some talk around the photocopier. But you must realise that most people who like a little kink prefer to keep their preferences private. That’s fine, and not the same as being ashamed of what we enjoy. Not everyone outside our lifestyle gets it, people can be judgemental. I get that you prefer to avoid complications, and it’s no one’s business but ours in any case. So, we’re agreed on that much. What I don't really get though is your insistence on keeping Thea and Mrs Richmond totally separate. And your blind panic last week when you came face to face with me. You were terrified, and I can't work out why. I hadn’t said I was going to out you, and there was no reason to suppose I would. I had as much to lose as you, probably.”
“You? What would you have to worry about? People take you seriously. You own your own company, for Heaven’s sake. What would it matter what anyone thinks of you?”
“Are you saying that people don't take you seriously? Why would you think that?”
“It’s always harder for women. In business. You have to be tough. And single minded. No distractions and definitely no scandal. I can't afford to let anyone find out. I just can’t.”
“Sweetheart, no one’s going to find out from me. But even if they did, we’d weather it. We’re consenting adults, we can do as we like.”
“No! No, you don't understand.” She shook her head, vehement in her denial.
“Then tell me, Thea. Make me understand.”
“I’m a private person. I always have been. The way I behave when we’re at the club. Here, last night. That’s not the real me.”
“It sure looked like you.”
“Don’t make fun of me. Please.” Her eyes glittered with tears about to fall, but Tony resisted the temptation to comfort. In his experience tears were an honest response from a submissive, and that was what he most required from her now. She would have nowhere to hide.
“You and I share somewhat singular tastes, Thea. But what we do harms no one—including ourselves—so we have nothing to feel ashamed of. Mrs Richmond, Thea, both are different facets of one beautiful woman. Keep your private life private by all means, but don't deny what, who you are. Accept your submission, love it as I do. Most important, don’t lie to yourself, and most certainly don’t lie to me.”
“I don't mean to be dishonest. It’s just—hard.”
“It doesn't have to be. Let me prove it to you.”
“How? How will you do that?”
“Come to work for me. Be my colleague in the office, and my submissive here. Or at the club. Or at your apartment if you prefer. Let me into your other side, allow me to know all of you. Blur the edges, and see what happens.”
“I suppose I already started to do that. By coming here last night.”
“Why did you come?”
“Because you ordered me to. I needed to obey. I needed…”
“You needed a bit of Sir time? Yes?”
“Yes.” Her voice had dropped to a whisper. “I never felt like that before.”
“You never actively defied me before.”
“No, Sir. I think now I was looking for a reaction from you. I needed you to take control. Are you still angry?”
Now he did relent. Reaching for her he pulled her to him for a hug. He dropped a kiss onto her hair. “No, and I wasn’t angry last night either. As you say, you needed the discipline. You got it. We move on.”
“Thank you, Sir.”
“And talking of moving on, what do you want to do today? Do you have any plans?”
Still in his arms she tipped up her chin to look at him. “I usually do my shopping at the weekend, clean my apartment. That sort of thing.”
“Very commendable. Do you fancy a change? I thought we might go bowling.”
“We … what?” Her face was a picture, her expression one of absolute incredulity. It was