the floor with a dull thud. He grunted softly and caught her, somehow managing to keep them both upright. Wrapping her arms around his neck, she arched against him and fused her mouth to his. She tasted his shock, his hesitation, before his arms tightened around her and he stood, keeping her in his arms.
He kissed her back. Deep, wet kisses, his tongue rasping against hers, his five-o’clock shadow scraping against her chin and upper lip. He felt...God...he felt so good. Too good. Solid and hot. His chest bigger, his shoulders broader, his entire body harder than what she remembered. He didn’t kiss her like the sad-eyed boy she’d loved—softly and reverently and carefully. He kissed like a man with one intention. Seduction. Long, slow, mind-numbing kisses that threatened to drag her under his spell. Put her completely in his control.
He slipped his hands under her shirt, skimmed them across her lower back, then settled them on her waist, his thumbs rubbing circles on her stomach as he walked her backward. Lifting his head, he guided her to the far corner of the porch on the other side of the kitchen window, pressed her against the side of the house and slid his knee between her thighs.
He dragged her shirt up, the backs of his knuckles brushing across her ribs. Bunching the material under her arms, he reached behind her and undid her bra, pushing the cups up before he lifted his head and stepped back. He cupped her, the skin of his palms rough against her breasts, his eyes glittering in the darkness.
“Still soft,” he murmured, caressing her lightly, trailing his fingers down the slope of her breasts to circle her areolae. Her nipples tightened. Her core contracted. He pinched her left nipple, rolled the tip between his thumb and forefinger.
He bent his head, touched his tongue to her right nipple. Looked up at her. “Still tasty,” he said, his voice husky, his breath hot on her.
Then he sucked her into his mouth.
Maddie shut her eyes and concentrated on how good it felt to have his mouth, warm and wet on one breast, his fingers firm and sure on the other. Need settled heavily in her stomach, moisture pooled between her legs. She ran her hands over his shoulders, down his arms and up to hold his head, her fingers sifting through the cool strands of his hair.
Neil slid his hand down her side, across the waistband of her pants. She inhaled sharply, her stomach muscles quivering. Back and forth his hand went. Back and forth. He straightened, kissed her again, one hand again holding her head, the other now slipping under the stretchy material of her pants and underwear to barely, just barely, graze her curls.
Longing, need, unlike any she’d ever experienced, filled her, deep-seated and burning.
All because Neil was kissing her. Touching her. Neil. Always Neil.
Only Neil.
Panic suffused her, had her wrenching her head back with enough force that she whacked it against the house with a sharp rap.
“Easy,” he said, reaching for her.
She slapped his hands away, but when she spoke, her voice was thin. Needy. “Don’t. Just...don’t touch me.”
He lowered his arms, the flickering light casting shadows on his face. “You didn’t seem to mind a second ago.”
That’d been the problem. Was still the problem. She craved his touch. More than that, she wanted to touch him back, to see if she could still make his breath quicken. If she could still make him quiver when she took him into her mouth.
She licked her lips, crossed her arms to cover herself. To hold herself together. “I don’t want this.”
His eyes flashed. “Liar. You may not like it, you may wish you didn’t, but you still want me. Just as much as I want you.” He edged closer, his mouth tense. “I tried to forget you, to be free of you, but you’re always there. In my head. In my dreams. Goddamn it, Maddie,” he said harshly, his voice unsteady, “you’re always there.”
“I know,” she whispered. It was the same for her. “I know.”
He inhaled sharply, leaned down to kiss her. Sanity and clarity resurfaced and she stiffened, set her hands on his chest to push him back. To push him away. Neil shook his head, one quick shake. Their gazes locked. Held.
Her heart raced. She couldn’t catch her breath. Oh, God, Neil was right. She was nothing but a liar.
They moved at the same time, their mouths melding together. Gone was any resistance on her