Takeoff (Open Skies #5) - Becca Jameson Page 0,13
on to her sanity.
When he took a step toward her, she held out a hand. “Stay there.”
He chuckled. “Okay, but Rae, there’s no reason to panic. I like the way you react to me. I’m glad you’re attracted to me. It would suck if you weren’t.”
“Well, it feels overwhelming to me, okay? I can’t think right when you’re touching me. I lose all my brain cells.”
Deacon blew out a breath. “It’s like pheromones or something, Rae. I feel it too. We’re attracted to each other. It happens.”
She set a hand on her head. “Okay, but slow it down.”
He smiled at her. The infuriating man. She couldn’t even be angry with him. Even while she was having an irrational mini-tantrum over something as ridiculous as sexual frustration, he was still kind.
He sat, for which she was grateful. “Exactly how many men have you slept with?”
She glared at him. “A lot. I don’t know how many.”
“And none of them made your toes curl?”
“No.” She eased over to the sofa but sat as far away from him as possible, squishing into the corner.
“Did any of them make you orgasm?”
That flush returned. “No. Okay? Can we stop discussing my past love life?”
“Just one more question. Please?”
She sighed.
“You masturbate, right? I mean, you orgasm alone, right?”
She shot him her most exasperated glare. “Yes. I’m a grown woman. I have plenty of battery-operated devices, Deacon. I’ve just never lost control when another person was in the room. It feels out of body or something.”
He nodded slowly. “It does. Good sex consumes you so nothing else exists. Your focus narrows.”
“Yeah. That.”
He smiled again. “So, we have chemistry.”
“I could fall hard for you.”
“And that would be so bad?”
She stretched her neck. “I promised myself I would never fall for anyone. It’s not in the cards for me. This is dangerous territory.”
“If it makes you feel any better, it’s not good timing for me either. My life is disheveled right now. It’s not looking like it will be less messy anytime soon either. I’m being unfair to you just by spending time with you, but I can’t stop myself because I want to be with you.”
She nodded. At least they understood each other and they were on the same page, even though there were definitely holes in his side of the equation. Whatever was untidy in his world was a mystery. She understood that he’d lost a brother recently, and that could be painful, but she suspected there was more to it, and whatever it was, it probably involved his parents. Perhaps they weren’t taking the death well. That would make sense. No one should have to bury a child. She shuddered just thinking about it.
Deacon suddenly stood, pushing off his thighs as if he were almost too tired to get up. “I should go. You need to sleep. We both need to think and regroup.”
She nodded, but inside her head, she was screaming, “Don’t go. Please. Stay.” She wanted to feel all of the things she’d barely glimpsed. It wasn’t a good idea, but she wanted it anyway.
Instead of voicing her thoughts, she rose to her feet.
Deacon headed for the door. “Text me when you get to your hotel tomorrow night, okay?”
“Yes.” Her voice was soft. She hated that he was leaving. It was irrational and unfair of her to push and pull on him the way she did. It was a wonder he didn’t have whiplash from all the times she’d told him to keep his distance and then tugged him into her embrace.
“I need to go see my parents Saturday morning. Not sure if I’ll get back before you get home from work or not.”
“Okay.” She needed to let him set the pace here. Every time she tried, she fucked it up. She followed him to the door but kept a few feet between them. The distance felt like a mile.
Deacon faced the door, setting his hand on the knob. For a moment, she was certain he would open it and walk out of the condo without another word. But suddenly, he spun back around and reached for her, pulling her into his embrace. He hugged her close, almost too tight.
She tucked her head under his chin and wrapped her arms around him. There was no denying they had an odd connection. It felt so right in his arms. All the craziness in her life faded when he touched her. Inhaling his scent soothed her.
Finally, he eased back, but he gripped her biceps and met her