seen before. All the boys at her school had been lanky, spotty specimens. But here was a man. She remembered when he’d first made love to her she had been so shocked by the strength of that solid body. She’d never known anything like it. The few fumbles in the games equipment cupboard at school on disco night were no match for the magnetism that formed between her and Greg.
‘Here!’ Johnny handed her a drink and she took a huge gulp and nearly spat it out.
‘What is it?’
‘A Bali special cocktail!’ he said, nudging her in the ribs.
She grinned at him and they started to wander around a huge grassy area; it was like a country fair, only a lot louder, and with far more hallucinogenic drugs and fairy lights around. Johnny grabbed her arm and dragged her to a bar. They were surrounded by noise. She felt dwarfed by everyone; the smell of sweat and aftershave, bodies swaying with glow sticks around their necks. Beards everywhere. Yet amidst all these hirsute males growing beards, the women, it seemed, removed the hair on their bodies equally fast.
The main stage was like an open-mouthed whale, housing the main acts, surrounded by screaming fans. More crowds had gathered at the front and nearer the back a few people were on beach camping chairs and rugs, lazily placed sprawled across each other, the way that youngsters do, not a care about cellulite or about muffin tops. She yanked her T-shirt down.
Ed came up to her with a plate of chicken satay. She was surrounded by the aroma of spicy roast peanuts. ‘Let’s go sit on the beach.’
They found the others on the beach, where a few towels had been placed on the sand, along with a couple of camping chairs with lanterns dangling from them, scattering light across the sand. Johnny immediately found her a seat, which she took with a smile.
‘Hey, I’m not an old dear, you know.’ She batted away his hand, laughing. Adity was handing round beers. She took one, took a slug and then started coughing.
‘Easy, Mum!’
Ed’s new mates were lying on the beach. She studied the boys’ long legs, their muscly thighs sticking out of board shorts, the various leather, shell and beaded bracelets that seemed to adorn all of the twenty-somethings these days. Ed nudged her. ‘You OK? Adity and I are just going for a stroll.’
She nodded and looked at the view. It was dusky and the sea was an inky black lake with a blood-red sun setting on its horizon, bleeding magenta fingers where the sky met the water. A few stars had punctured the smoky blue canopy above. Ed and Adity had wandered down to the shoreline, and she spotted them, their bodies pressed together in passion, and felt a pang of something she couldn’t reconcile. Her mind flicked to Greg, but she hastily shook it away. That chapter is closed.
A welcome breeze brushed her cheeks and she looked over the landscape: a few rows of tents, multi-coloured domes of nylon, pinned to the earth, little capsules for sleeping, eating, and sex at 5 a.m. after stumbling in from the music. A couple of girls were already on men’s shoulders, the base thumping out music in time to the beat of her heart.
An elfin blonde-haired girl in cut-off denim shorts sat down next to her on the sand and patted her on the thigh. ‘Hey, you should try this.’ She smiled and started to rummage in her shorts pockets as Maddie’s heart thudded. Drugs!
‘Here!’ The girl was grinning at her and Maddie stared at her hands. She had her finger dipped in a pot of silver glitter and was swirling it around. Maddie laughed. The girl kneeled up in order to reach Maddie and started dabbing it across Maddie’s cheeks. ‘What’s your name?’
‘Maddie.’
‘That’s cool. Hey, you’ve got great skin, by the way, really soft for a woman your— oh, sorry.’
‘Don’t be sorry – do I?’
‘Yeah! Hey, I know!’ And the girl whipped out her phone and then held it in front of the two of them. ‘A selfie!’ She snapped away. ‘I’ll send them to you.’
‘Mum,’ Ed interrupted her thoughts. He was standing in front of her, her six-foot-three man-boy. ‘We’re going to the main act. Shall I, like, walk you back? I don’t think it will be your scene.’ Code for you will cramp my style, but she didn’t mind; she was exhausted.