T-Bone - L. Wilder Page 0,85
inside. I have to admit, going into that room with all those tiny babies in their incubators was a little rattling, especially with all the nurses buzzing around to make sure they were all okay. I could tell by the panicked look in her eyes that Alyssa was feeling the same as the nurse brought us to the back of the room. When we reached JT’s crib, I was surprised to find it empty. Clearly alarmed by the fact, Alyssa looked over to the nurse and asked, “Where is he? Is something wrong?”
“Umm, no. Actually, he’s just fine.” She leaned over to the nurse in the next cubicle and said, “Hey, Michele. JT’s parents are here.”
When the nurse turned around, I could see that she was carrying JT in her arms. As she rushed over to us, she said, “Oh! I’m so sorry. We usually don’t have babies his size around here, and I just can’t seem to put the little guy down.”
“So, he’s doing okay?”
“Oh, yes.” The nurse bent down and placed JT in Alyssa’s arms. “He’s doing more than okay.”
Tears filled Alyssa’s eyes as she looked down at our son and said, “He’s perfect.”
“Yes, he is.” Katie leaned over to me and asked, “Would you like to see if you can get him to nurse?”
I nodded, and Katie carefully helped me to lower my gown. My sutures were still very tender, so she placed a pillow under JT for support. We tried for several minutes to get him to latch on, but he simply wasn’t having it. Trying her best to reassure me, Katie smiled. “No worries. He’s just going to need some time. How ‘bout I go get him a bottle and see if that works any better?”
“Okay. Sounds good.”
When Katie turned and walked away, I grabbed one of the empty chairs and moved it over next to Alyssa, and as I sat down, she asked, “What if we can’t get him to nurse?”
“Then, he’ll take a bottle. Either way will be fine, babe.”
“But I wanted him…”
“It’ll be fine. Promise.”
She nodded, then turned her attention to JT. I watched as she ran the tip of her finger down his tiny nose. “Hey there, handsome. It’s your momma. I’ve been missing you.”
He nestled up next her as if he’d done it a million times, and that’s all it took. Alyssa’s worries about him not knowing her quickly faded, and with a look of complete wonder, she stared down at him as she whispered, “There’s someone else here who’d like to meet you, sweet boy. This is your daddy.” She winced as she leaned over and positioned JT in my arms. “Your momma didn’t tell him she was pregnant with you, so he was kind of surprised to find out about you. But I can tell just by looking at him that he loves you very much.”
“That I do.” I looked down at my boy, and my heart swelled with emotion. Damn, I’d always thought of myself as a pretty strong, tough guy, but as I sat there with JT in my arms, it was all I could do to keep myself from crying like a damn schoolgirl. He was just so beautiful, so perfect, and he was mine. For the first time in my life, that empty void in my heart was completely full. That feeling inspired me to say, “Alyssa, I’ll leave it all behind. If that’s what you want, I’ll do it. I’ll do whatever you want.”
“What are you talking about, Beckett?”
“The club has been my whole life for as long as I can remember, but for you and JT, I’m willing to give it all up. You two are the most important people in my life now, and if—”
“No, Beckett.” She reached over and placed the palm of her hand on my cheek. “I would never ask you to give up your brothers or the club. Besides, I want them to be a part of our lives. I want what you and Hyde talked about. You know, for all of us to be a family.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, I’m sure.” Her eyes met mine as she said, “I just want us to be together and for things to be like they were before. Do you think we can do that?”
“Absolutely.”
“Well, it’s not going to be easy, especially with a baby in the mix, but I want to try. I love you, Beckett, and I’ve missed you terribly.”
“I feel the same, and that’s why I think you