One with You(66)

“My concern is that she’s become a coping mechanism for you,” Dr. Petersen said. “You’ve found someone who loves you and believes you, who supports you and gives you strength. In many ways, you feel like she’s the only one who will ever truly understand you.”

“She’s in a unique position to do so.”

“Not that unique,” he said kindly. “I’ve read the transcripts of some of your speeches. You’re aware of the statistics.”

Yes, I knew that one in every four women I met had been exposed to sexual abuse. That didn’t change the fact that none of them had evoked the feelings of affinity that Eva did. “If there’s a point, Doctor, I’d like you to get to it.”

“I want you to be mindful of a potential tendency to seclude yourself with Eva, to the exclusion of everyone else. I asked if you would gift her with a pet, because I can’t see you doing so. That would shift her focus and affection away from you, even if only slightly, while your focus and affection is centered entirely on her.”

I drummed my fingertips on the arm of the sofa. “That’s not unusual for newlyweds.”

“It’s unusual for you.” He leaned forward. “Did Eva say why she gave Lucky to you?”

I hesitated, preferring to keep something so intimate to myself. “She wants me to have more unconditional love.”

He smiled. “And I’m certain it will give her great pleasure to see you reciprocating that. She’s pushed very hard for you to open up to her and to me. Now that you’re taking those steps, she’ll want you to open up to others. The bigger her intimate circle is, the happier she is. She wants to pull you into that, not have you pull her out of it.”

My lungs expanded on a long, deep breath. He was right, much as I hated to admit it.

Dr. Petersen sat back again and resumed scrawling on the screen of his tablet, giving me time to absorb what he said.

I asked him something that had been on my mind. “When I told you about Hugh …”

He gave me his full attention. “Yes?”

“You didn’t seem surprised.”

“And you want to know why.” His gaze was kind. “There were certain markers. I could say I deduced it, but that wouldn’t be entirely true.”

I felt my phone buzz in my pocket but ignored it, despite knowing that only a handful of people were programmed to bypass the do-not-disturb setting I used during my meetings with Dr. Petersen.

“I saw Eva shortly after she moved to New York,” he went on. “She asked me if it was possible for two abuse survivors to have a meaningful relationship. It was only a few days later when you contacted me and asked if I’d be open to seeing you, in addition to seeing you and Eva as a couple.”

My pulse quickened. “I hadn’t told her then. I didn’t until we’d been coming to you for a while.”

But I’d had nightmares, the really bad ones that had been coming less frequently of late.

My phone buzzed again and I pulled it out. “Excuse me.”

It was Angus. I’m outside the office door, he’d texted first. This time, It’s urgent.

My spine stiffened. Angus wouldn’t disturb me without a very good reason. I stood. “I’ll have to cut this short,” I told Dr. Petersen.

He set aside his tablet and rose to his feet. “Is everything all right?”

“If not, I’m sure you’ll hear about it on Thursday.” I shook his hand quickly and left the office, passing through the empty reception area before stepping out to the hallway.

Angus stood there, looking grim. He wasted no time. “The police are at the penthouse with Eva.”

My blood turned to ice. I strode to the elevator with Angus falling into step beside me. “Why?”

“Anne Lucas filed charges of harassment.”

7

My hand shook as I poured freshly brewed coffee into three mugs. I couldn’t tell if that was because I was so pissed off or because I was afraid. Certainly, I was both. Being a cop’s daughter, I understood the unwritten rules followed by those who worked behind the blue wall of law enforcement. And after everything Gideon and I had been through regarding Nathan’s death, I was doubly on my guard now.

But it wasn’t Detectives Graves and Michna of the homicide division who wanted to speak to me. I couldn’t decide if that made me more or less anxious. They were the devil I knew, so to speak. And while I wouldn’t go so far as to call Shelley Graves an ally, she’d dropped the case when she still had questions without answers.