Sword in the Stars (Once & Future #2) - Cori McCarthy Page 0,102

slowly, half confused, half shocked.

Gwen was impatient. “Of course, but—”

“What if he already did? What if we met Kai years ago… and he’s been with us all along?”

Gwen looked at Merlin for half a second and then back at Ari. “What?”

“We have been flying around the cosmos with a backward aging magician like it’s no big deal.”

Gwen put her hands on her hips, making a fresh cloud of glitter fall to the ground. “I don’t understand what you’re saying. How could Merlin be my baby?”

Merlin held up a finger. “Technically I’m not. Or, I was, but that was a few millennia ago. See, the baby became Old Merlin, and then aged down, and down, and down to… well, me.” The girls stared until he added, “And then aged back up a bit. Toddling about, entranced by my own boogers, wasn’t for me, not when I knew there was an alternative. I hope you understand.”

“My baby turned into Old Merlin?” Gwen shouted. “The mage who stormed around Camelot telling everyone that I was a scheming harlot? That’s ridiculous. It’s horrendous. It’s—”

Merlin closed his eyes and spoke fast. “I turned the baby into Old Merlin, started him on his path in Camelot. That’s why the old version of me was so feral. I might have looked like an old man, but I had an infant’s understanding of the world. It was all hunger and fear. And that’s why I formed a desperate tether to the one person I loved.”

“Arthur,” Ari said, head down as she touched her new sword lovingly. Gwen shook her head, which only freed more sparkles. “Glitter, Merlin? Really?”

“It was the first thing that sprang to mind!”

“How could you, Merlin?” Gwen asked, scolding in a way that felt distinctly parental. “How could you do that to Kairos?”

“I did it to myself, point of fact,” Merlin said, the truth etched on him as pain. “I knew that, no matter how much I suffered by living through the cycle, I would survive it and find you eventually. Any other choice could have kept us apart forever.”

“You’re telling me you put yourself through all of those monstrous, lonely lifetimes to come back to us?” Gwen peered at him from all sides.

“I had to. You’re my family.”

Gwen grabbed his hand, pulling it close to her face. She examined each digit as if counting and inspecting a newborn’s fingers. “Are you really mine?” she asked. “I should know. I should look at you and just know.”

“Our family does stretch the imagination a tad.” Merlin smiled crookedly. “Although, the first time I saw you, you seemed familiar. I thought maybe it was because Old Merlin had had those run-ins with you back in Camelot, but now I think I was remembering your voice. Your face. I know most people don’t remember their birth, but I’m not most people.”

Gwen let go of his hand. “I’m really confused right now. I think I need a minute.”

“I understand. I had about fifteen years to think it all through.” Merlin plucked a soft pretzel out of the hands of a frozen person. “Time travel is horrible on the blood sugar.”

Gwen watched him devour it. “Oh, gods, he really is Kay’s baby.”

“He has your eyes,” Ari said. “Kay’s hair. Can’t believe I never noticed before.”

Gwen shook her head. “How do I explain to people that I have a seventeen-year-old baby?”

“I’m closer to twenty now,” Merlin said, rubbing his stubble proudly.

“My baby is older than me,” Gwen deadpanned. “Sure, why not.” She rushed at him, nearly picking him up despite their size difference. Ari’s relief wrestled with her panic. Time might be on pause, but a hundred weapons were still pointed at them.

“I’m going to stop Nin,” he said into Gwen’s shoulder, holding her tightly. “I know how she became so powerful.”

“Do you also know she’s been pretending to be the new Administrator?” Ari asked, sheathing the beautiful sword in her belt.

Merlin opened and closed his mouth. “What? She has no body. It’s part of the problem, truth be told, although it does keep her locked in that cave, which is a help.”

“Well, she’s figured out how to use Mercer’s technology to be here now, as a hologram of some sort.” Ari cursed. “There have been signs all along that she’s been dabbling with humanity in this time period. I should have seen it.”

“That’s why she wanted my baby…” Gwen touched Merlin’s scruffy, lightly bearded cheek. “Why she wanted you. If Mercer had taken you, you never would have been born