The Sweetgum Ladies Knit for Love - By Beth Pattillo Page 0,63

had ever challenged her for control, not like this. And yet she knew he wasn’t trying to manipulate or dominate her. In her experience, relationships had always been about gaining the upper hand and never leaving herself vulnerable. Especially after—

Maybe it was midlife hormones. Maybe it was reading too much Gone with the Wind in one sitting. Or maybe it was just the crushing loneliness and fear that had weighed on her every day since she’d knelt beside Frank’s dead body on that putting green.

“All right,” she said, breathless with fear and a growing feeling of excitement. “All right. I’ll have dinner with you.”

Her husband hadn’t been dead for more than four months. People in Sweetgum would be scandalized. But at that moment, Esther didn’t care about anyone else’s opinion. For the first time in a very long time, she could feel the blood flowing through her veins, the breath moving in and out of her lungs. Normally, she only felt this way in her garden, but since the moment she’d met Brody McCullough on the lake road, something in her had reawakened.

“I’ll pick you up at seven,” he said.

“Fine.”

And then he was gone.

She was a fool, but at that moment she couldn’t bring herself to care. Not when the scent of pine from the windbreak on the west side of the house filled her senses almost as much as Brody McCullough.

December arrived on the winds of a cold front that frosted windshields in the early morning and gave the popular girls at Sweetgum High a chance to show off their Ugg boots.

Hannah, in Converse tennis shoes she’d covered with ink doodles, followed the line of pompom girls into the rest room after her first class. A six-minute passing period didn’t allow for much standing around, although that’s exactly what a lot of the girls were doing. Putting their hair up, taking it down, applying lip gloss and then removing it in favor of a different shade. Hannah waited her turn for a stall. Fortunately, it didn’t take long. She was almost done when she heard Courtney’s voice above the general din.

“It’s so pathetic, the way she’s chasing him. He practically has to step over her in the hall since she’s always underfoot.”

Hannah’s spine tingled. The last couple of weeks hadn’t been much fun since Josh had blurted out the truth. Almost as soon as he’d moved back to Sweetgum, Courtney had maneuvered him into asking her to the homecoming dance. And so on that important night, Hannah had slunk off to the Knit Lit Society instead of entering the gym with Josh. He’d apologized all over himself brought her a single rose—everything he could think of to make it up to her. But it had still hurt, even if it was clear he would’ve preferred to spend the evening with her.

For a while, since last year, Courtney and the others had left Hannah alone. It helped that Courtney’s mom was also a member of the Knit Lit Society. They’d finished middle school in a sort of truce, but once they’d walked through the doors of Sweet-gum High, that had changed. Especially once Josh made his preference for Hannah clear.

“Josh is such a hottie,” another girl chimed in. “I can’t believe he’d look twice at a loser like Hannah Simmons.”

Hannah’s hand froze on the lock of the stall door.

“Well, she can crawl after him all she wants, but he took me to the homecoming dance.” Courtney always sounded confident.

“By senior year you’ll be prom king and queen.” A third voice joined the conversation.

“Yeah, and Hannah’ll be throwing herself at his feet while they put the crown on his head.” Everyone laughed at that. Hannah swallowed hard, determined not to cry.

“C’mon, you guys, we’re going to be late.” The zip of purses, the sound of cell phones snapping shut. Hannah stayed put long enough to give them time to leave the rest room. She would have waited until the bell rang, but she couldn’t afford another tardy. She slipped out of the stall and crossed to the sink to wash her hands. The lone remaining occupant of the rest room, a chess club geek named Gloria, smiled sympathetically. Hannah tried to return her smile, but when she looked in the mirror she saw that it came out more like a grimace.

“Pompoms are so superficial,” the girl said.

“Yeah.” Even though Hannah knew Courtney’s comments sprang from jealousy, she also felt the bitter sting of rejection. Josh had said he couldn’t back out