a nutter!” I have to laugh at the thought of little Kaidans-in-training. “One boy. Maybe two boys, but even that’s pushing it.”
Shite, she’s got me entertaining this ridiculous notion.
“We have to have girls, too!” Her voice is filled with happiness, but again the thought of Marissa’s nieces flashes through my mind, and all the girls I’ve hurt. All the daughters and sisters and future mums I helped lead down paths they may or may not have been able to find their way back from.
“No girls,” I say.
She turns to look at me, and the small space is suddenly stifling. I sit up.
“What’s wrong?” Anna asks.
I rub my eyes to clear their faces from my vision.
“I can’t even . . . Just the thought of having to care for a girl, watching all the bloody gits sniff around her with their red auras . . . it would kill me and I would deserve it, because I was the worst offender of all.”
“Kai . . .” She touches my arm, and I feel like shit.
“No.” I can’t play along anymore. “I’m sorry, luv, but kids are not my dream. Especially girls.”
“Okay.” Her voice is soft and gentle. “Let’s try to get a little sleep.”
“I’m sorry,” I say, hating that I’ve ruined the moment.
But Anna only lies back down and leads me to do the same. She pulls my arm around her waist, nudging me to spoon her from behind again, and I press my nose into her hair.
Why must I always be such a prick? It was harmless make-believe. I should’ve just let her have her fun and kept my mouth shut.
“Are you angry with me?” I whisper.
She rolls over to face me, touching my cheek. “No, Kai.” She tries to reassure me and kisses me before rolling back over. I pull her closer to my chest and listen to her breathing change as the minutes tick by, until it becomes slow and even.
I can’t afford to dream like Anna does. This moment, and every moment I get to have with her, is my dream come true.
“You’re my dream,” I whisper to my sleeping angel. “My only dream.”
CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX
Heartwarming
“Exit light.
Enter night.”
—“Enter Sandman” by Metallica
The following morning we return to Patti’s new home and say good-bye to all our Neph mates. It feels strange when they leave, and I realize that yesterday was the first time we’ve all been together and just let ourselves be semi-normal. We sat around a table and had a proper meal, like a real family. Marna and Ginger even had a row, of course, because what would a family holiday be without drama?
It was actually quite nice. Aside from the fighting bit.
I’m not ready to leave, but it’s nearly time. The Dukes will all be returning to their stations now that their Switzerland gathering is over. I’ve got to take care of this estate business in Georgia and head back to L.A. I’m a bit peeved Father still hasn’t bothered to contact me, but I suppose he’s never been the most considerate soul.
Anna shows me to the upstairs shower and I resist the strong urge to pull her in with me. Not sure Patti would appreciate that. So I reluctantly let her go, and climb under the warm stream alone.
I’m halfway through washing my hair when I get a prickly sensation on my neck. I stand very still as bubbles rinse down my face and neck, and I push my hearing down the hall, down the stairs, down to the family room where I believe Patti, Jay, and Anna are likely sitting.
What I find is commotion—bangs and grunts, a moan. What the hell?
I spin and shut off the water, then rip the curtain so hard the damn rod comes off the wall and I’m tangled in loads of plastic and ruffles. I finally get the curtain off and jump from the tub. Nobody is saying anything, but it sounds like a definite fight down there. I bypass my boxers and grab my shorts, yanking them onto my soaking wet legs and diving for the door, slipping a bit on the tiles.
“Don’t come down!” Anna yells, but to hell with that.
I run down the hall and fly down the steps, bursting into the family room just as Anna is racing out the back door. A quick survey of the room shows Jay standing there shell-shocked, and Patti on the floor, ashen, but alive. I run to the door and see Anna staring around the garden and trees, hilt