But we are here to tell humans to take what they want. And when they have the nerve to cry over the consequences—to pout and curse the world—we laugh. Because the Maker is hurting.”
“Why?” Kaidan breathed. “If they’re all so horrible, why does it hurt Him?”
Pharzuph’s eyes narrowed into a sneer. “Because He loves them. Because He’s promised them free will, which means he will not interfere in their idiotic choices. It’s pathetic.” Now Pharzuph chuckled. “He’s backed himself into a corner and can only watch as His creation destroys itself . . . with our help. And never forget—as much as He loves them, he loathes our kind. Never. Forget. His unworthy humans are all born with a chance at reaching the heavenly realm. You were not born with that chance.”
Kaidan pressed his hands hard against the chair arms to keep from trembling. He hated when his father spoke of hell—that place of dimness where joy could not be had—the place he was destined to go when he died.
At a knock on the house door, Pharzuph smiled. “Now you understand the why of our job. It’s time to learn the how. Our helpers have arrived. Are you ready, Kaidan?”
The young Neph could not speak. He could only nod. He’d spent the last year mentally preparing himself for this and wanted to make his father proud.
“Very well,” said his father. “You’re going to love your job, son. I daresay it’s the best of the lot.” He leaned forward and grinned at Kaidan. “You’ve got all the makings of a superb Neph. You will be a powerful force. You will bring people to their knees with the desire they feel for you, and they will spend the rest of their lives wishing for another touch, searching for another man like you. But there is only one Kaidan Rowe, and you will be like smoke. Make-believe. They cannot hold you, because there is no one like you who exists in their world.”
Kaidan’s heart pounded in the wake of his father’s words. Then he heard several sets of footsteps coming down the hall toward their sitting room—toward him. He gripped the chair’s arms tighter and set his face in a bored expression to hide the fear and excitement exploding through him like indecipherable lyrics. It was time to set himself apart from the other boys. There was no room in his life for guilt or humanistic morals. He was born for this. He was determined to embrace it and finally earn his father’s approval, despite the sourness rising up in his throat.
Pharzuph leaned back in his chair, lifting an ankle across his knee, staring darkly at Kaidan. A knock sounded on the sitting room door and his father’s lips rose in a wicked grin. “And now, son, the fun begins.”
PART ONE
Sweet Evil
“Break Me” by Kaidan Rowe
I can see you, see you, see you, seeking me out.
You can sense me, sense me, and it’s freaking you out.
I make you thirsty, hungry, but you can’t stay away.
Your eyes are on my body ’cause you want it my way.
Your mind and soul are screaming,
Saying RUN from the danger.
You know that something ain’t right
But you’re a bee to my nectar.
Your mind and soul are screaming,
Warning, “He’s gonna break us,”
But your body is begging me
To feed your emptiness. . . .
CHORUS:
I want those eyes to push me
And those hands to pull me,
Need those hips to break me,
Baby, break me, break me.
It’s gonna hurt tomorrow
When you’re sayonara,
But for now, for now, baby, break me,
Break me.
You ignored all the signs
From your heart and your mind
Now your body is spent,
Baby, broken, broken.
You had a taste of the good life,
Sweet and salt from the high dive.
Now your tongue is left craving.
Baby, craving, craving.
You and me, we were doomed.
Now you’re licking your wounds.
And I’m gone, baby, gone
On the winds of the dawn.
CHORUS
CHAPTER ONE
Before
“Like a big bad wolf I’m born to be bad and bad to the bone.
If you fall for me I’m only gonna tear you apart.”
—“Break Your Heart” by Taio Cruz
“I’m never gonna fall, but I’m never hard to catch . . .
My heart will never break, I’m just here to break a sweat.”
—“Casual Sex” by My Darkest Days
I’m the last of the band to walk into the party after our gig. I feel the eyes on me before I see them—the energy of auras blasting orange and red—excited whispers of “Oh my God, it’s Kaidan Rowe” carried along sublime waves of music at high wattage. Guardian angels float above their charges,