A Sweet Mess - Jayci Lee Page 0,84
tell him, right?”
“Yes. Of course,” she said with false bravado.
“Does he know how you feel about him?”
“I don’t think so.”
“Do you want him to?”
“I want forever with him and the baby. But I’m so afraid he’ll break my heart.”
“Then fight for them. You fight for the people you love. You can’t give up without giving it your everything,” her mom said with steel in her voice. “My biggest regret is not fighting for you and your father. I lost both of you. I couldn’t stop loving him after his first affair. I thought he’d come back to me eventually, but he didn’t. I was ashamed and afraid, and it became worse with every affair. I let my insecurities define me, and I pushed everyone away, even you, and I’m so sorry. But listen to me, Aubrey. Your father hurt me, but I’m the one who broke my heart. I’m the one who gave up without trying. I let myself disappear.”
“Mom.” Aubrey hurt so much for her mom. She had been so alone for so long. “You didn’t lose me. You could never lose me.”
“Oh, baby. I love you so much. You can do this. If he doesn’t see how damn lucky he is to have you, then he doesn’t deserve you. Don’t be afraid of losing him. It’ll be easier to bear than losing yourself.”
“I love you, Mom.”
After they hung up, Aubrey knew what she needed to do. She had to tell Landon she loved him and wanted forever with him. And tell him about the baby. Even if he wasn’t ready to become a father, he’d make a great one. What mattered most was whether he wanted forever with her. If he wanted her like she wanted him, they could figure out everything else together.
Aubrey was going to fight for them.
* * *
After a long nap, which she finally understood was a symptom of early pregnancy, Aubrey prepared for the battle of her life. She actually hoped it wouldn’t be a battle at all. She would tell Landon she loved him, and he would tell her he loved her back. Yay.
Aubrey cooked balsamic-marinated chicken breasts and tomato bisque, planning to serve them with crusty bread. She wouldn’t be eating much, so she kept the menu simple. She washed her hair and dried it with care and put on light makeup to boost her confidence. Then she squeezed into a soft, pink dress and waited for Landon to come home.
The wax from the candle had melted and dripped into globs at the base of the holder. The minutes ticked by, and their dinner grew cold. And Aubrey’s dress grew increasingly uncomfortable. She checked the wall clock for the seventh time in fifteen minutes and jumped when her cell phone binged. A text from Landon.
Landon: Please have dinner without me. I’m putting out a fire. I’ll be back late.
The unexpected delay deflated her like a punctured balloon, and her hands started to shake as the adrenaline faded from her system. Aubrey blew out the candles and put away the dinner with the speed and agility of an unoiled Tin Man. Once that was done, she found herself pacing around in the quiet house, unable to settle her nerves.
For a change of scenery, she climbed up the stairs to pace in her bedroom. After slipping out of the torturous dress, she took in a nice full breath and sighed, unconsciously placing her hands on her stomach. She’d only known for hours, but she loved the baby growing inside her.
Aubrey wanted Landon to know how much she loved him and how happy she was to be pregnant with his child. Even if he didn’t love her in return, she wanted him in their child’s life. If he didn’t want anything to do with either of them, she would have the baby without him. The thought petrified her, and a part of her still wanted to run away—to give up without a fight. It would hurt less than having him tell her he didn’t want her or the baby.
Tired of all the pacing and the endless what-ifs, Aubrey went out to the balcony with a thick robe wrapped around her and plopped down in a chair to gaze at the stars shining down on her.
The sound of a car crunching up the driveway jolted Aubrey awake. She must’ve dozed off, which seemed to happen whenever she wasn’t standing. Rubbing the chill from her arms, she walked inside and glanced groggily at the clock in