The Stone Sky (The Broken Earth, #3) - N. K. Jemisin Page 0,60

through your fear and horror, reason asserts itself. This strange imitation Fulcrum, which is not the true Fulcrum that he should have brought Nassun to. These children, gathered and not slaughtered. Nassun, openly controlling an obelisk well enough to do this … and yet Schaffa has not killed her. Something’s going on here that you’re not getting.

“Tell me more about this man,” you say, lifting your chin toward the pile of jumbled jewels. Your ex-husband.

The young man shrugs in an audible stirring of cloth. “Oh, right, uh. So, his name was Jija Resistant Jekity.” Because the young man is sighing down at the pile of rubble, you don’t think he sees you twitch at the wrongness of the comm name. “New to the comm, a knapper. We got too many men, but we needed a knapper bad, so when he turned up, we basically would’ve taken him in as long as he wasn’t old or sick or obviously crazy. You know?” He shrugs. “The girl seemed all right when they first got here. Wouldn’t know her for one of them, she was so proper and polite. Somebody raised her right.” You smile again. Perfect tight-jawed Guardian smile. “We only knew what she was because Jija had come here, see. Heard the rumors about how roggas could become … un-roggas, I guess. We get a lot of visitors who ask about that.”

You frown and nearly look away from Jija. Un-roggas?

“Not that it ever happened.” The young man sighs and adjusts his cane for comfort. “And not that we’d have taken in a kid who used to be one of them, right? What if that kid grew up and had kids who were wrong, too? Got to breed the taint out somehow. Anyway, the girl minded her father well enough until a few weeks ago. Neighbors said they heard him shouting at her one night, and then she moved up here to the compound with the others. You could see how the change sort of … untied Jija. He started talking to himself about how she wasn’t his daughter anymore. Cursing out loud, now and again. Hitting things—walls and such—when he thought you weren’t looking.

“And the girl, she pulled away. Can’t say I blame her; everybody was on eggshells around him for that while. Always the quiet ones, right? So I saw her hanging around Schaffa more. Like a duckling, always right there in his shadow. Whenever he’d hold still, she’d take his hand. And he—” The young man eyes you warily. “Don’t usually see you lot being affectionate. But he seemed to think the world of her. I hear he nearly killed Jija when the man came at her, actually.”

The hand that you don’t have twinges again, but it is more tentative this time and not the throb of before. Because … he wouldn’t have had to break Nassun’s hand, would he? No, no, no. You did that to her yourself. And Uche was another broken hand, inflicted by Jija. Schaffa protected her from Jija. Schaffa was affectionate with her, as you struggled to be. And now everything inside you shudders at the thought that follows, and it takes the willpower that has destroyed cities to keep this shudder internal, but …

But …

How much more welcome would a Guardian’s conditional, predictable love have been to Nassun, after her parents’ unconditional love had betrayed her again and again?

You close your eyes for a moment, because you don’t think Guardians cry.

With an effort, you say, “What is this place?”

He looks at you in surprise, then glances at Hoa, a ways behind you. “This is the comm of Jekity, Guardian. Though Schaffa and the others—” He gestures around you, at the compound. “They called this part of the comm ‘Found Moon.’”

Of course they did. And of course Schaffa already knew the secrets of the world that you’ve paid in flesh and blood to learn.

In your silence, the young man regards you thoughtfully. “I can introduce you to the headwoman. I know she’ll be glad to have Guardians around again. Good help against raiders.”

You’re looking at Jija again. You see one piece of jewel in the perfect likeness of a pinky finger. You know that pinky finger. You kissed that pinky finger—

It’s too much, you can’t do this, you’ve got to get a grip, get out of here before you break down any further. “I—I n-need—” Deep breath for calm. “I need some time to consider the situation. Would you go and let your headwoman