Stay With Me (She's With Me #2) - Jessica Cunsolo Page 0,78

was still my mom, but it was really hard for her, so she was pretty absent or high a lot of the time. She did her best when she could, and I wouldn’t trade her for anyone else, but because of that, it was usually just me and Luke left to look after each other, and sometimes her.”

She wipes her tears on her sweater and I stay quiet, hypnotized by her words and by the hardships that she’s telling me about.

“When I started high school, she started getting really bad. I would come home and she would be passed out on the bathroom floor, the pots on the stove overflowing and burning, fire detector going off.”

She sniffs. “I know it was pretty hard on Luke, but it was hard for me too! I knew that I could always depend on him. He was my big brother. He would always be there for me and make everything okay. But he didn’t! He made it worse! He fell into the wrong crowd and he fell down the same rabbit hole as my mom with the drugs. He’s the one who introduced her to heroin, sometimes they even did it together.”

I feel the tears flowing down my own face but force myself to stay quiet.

“And then she overdosed,” she continues. “I was the one who found her, too, and I was destroyed. My whole world died, and I had no idea what to do. I thought Luke would step in and be the hero I always thought he was, he’d make it better.” A sob escapes her lips and tears start flowing again, and I wrap my arms around her, letting her feel whatever emotions she needs to feel.

“But he didn’t! He left me! He left me on my own to navigate all the shit that was happening. If Luke’s dad, who we barely even knew, didn’t eventually feel guilty and pay off our apartment, I would’ve been on the streets.”

The tears silently stream down my face. Annalisa is always so strong and confident and sure of herself and what she wants. It’s so hard to picture her dealing with all of this, but I get why she’s so strong. Going through all of that has hardened her, made her tough and ready to face whatever the world throws at her, and I’m so incredibly grateful to know her.

She pulls away from me and I let my arms drop, and both of us dry our eyes.

“When Luke told me that he was clean, I didn’t want to believe him. I didn’t want to think that I could get my brother back, the one I depended on, because I was scared that he’d screw up somehow and I’d lose him again. And that’s exactly what happened! He got drunk and killed Aiden’s stepdad! And now I won’t get to see him for who knows how long.”

She takes a deep breath, as if trying to clear her head and calm down.

“There’s always a chance he didn’t do it,” I tell her, not wanting her to write off her brother just yet.

He’s trying. For her. He’s doing everything to try and get back into her life. It doesn’t look too good for him right now, but if there’s even the slightest chance that he’s innocent and doesn’t go to jail, deep down, Annalisa would love to have her brother back.

“I just don’t know how to feel, I guess,” she admits. “If he killed Greg then he deserves to go to jail. But I guess a part of me doesn’t want to see him rot in there, you know?”

“Of course,” I reassure her. “Despite everything, he’s still your brother. And if you need anything, you have us.”

“I know. You guys are all the best.”

She smiles a sad smile, but then shakes her head, as if trying to clear her thoughts, and suddenly her mask snaps back into place, and the emotions she was just displaying are gone.

“So anyway, am I picking Midnight Blue or Deep Purple for my nails?” she asks coolly, as if the last forty minutes never happened.

I sense that she’s done talking about it and don’t push her, telling her Midnight Blue is definitely her color, and we paint our nails and tell jokes and kid ourselves into thinking that everything is okay in our world.

19

Sunday goes by in a blur, and before we know it, it’s time to go to Andrew’s house.

“And you guys made fun of me for bringing my curling iron.”