Spinster Ever After (The Spinster Chronicles #7) - Rebecca Connolly Page 0,62
eyes, the pressure of them tightening her chest. “I hate seeing the distance between us. Thinking of him making room for someone else in my life. Changing the way things are between us, the way things have always been.”
“Then perhaps you ought to marry for convenience, dear.” Georgie lifted a shoulder, then bent to pluck her son from the rug and set him on her lap. “That way, Michael would always be your best friend, though he still would not be able to call.”
It was true, Charlotte knew it well, but the idea of marrying for convenience to keep Michael to herself did not sit well either.
Could not.
“I cannot do that,” Charlotte murmured. “I won’t marry for the sake of being married. I don’t have to do that. I simply don’t want to be alone, if I can help it. I see what all of you have found, and I wonder why I have been so unfortunate as to not find it yet. Why I stand alone in this now.”
Georgie bounced Thomas on her knee, giving Charlotte a look. “One of us was always going to be last, Charlotte, no matter what happened.”
Charlotte rolled her eyes briefly. “If we married, yes. But we never thought we would, so I don’t know that we ever really thought about it. And…”
“And you were never supposed to be last,” Georgie finished.
“Does that sound so very horrid?” Charlotte asked with a wince. “So snobbish and cold?”
Georgie shook her head, smiling still. “Not to me. You’re right, you and Grace were the mysteries of our bunch. Were we betting on our fates, I would have bet the pair of you to marry and have children before I ever managed a true courtship.”
Charlotte snickered, shaking her head as she thought back. “That certainly would have made the most sense, given our situations. But I wouldn’t trade it. While I hate being last, I wouldn’t trade the loves you all have found purely to satisfy my needs. You’ve all made splendid matches, and that is not something I would ever find regret in.”
“No, don’t!” Charlotte protested, holding up a hand as though to shield herself from Georgie’s emotion.
Georgie laughed and focused her attention on her son. “Fine, fine, I’ll rid myself of these tears shortly.”
“See that you do!”
Moments later, they shared a smile before Georgie looked back at her son. “How is it going, Charlotte? Are you having any success?”
Charlotte allowed herself to smile ruefully, though not for Georgie’s eyes. “Well, I’m not anticipating a proposal, if that’s what you mean.”
“Is that what I mean?” Georgie replied without any sharpness, though there was a distinct tone of understanding in her voice.
It wasn’t fair when she did that. Georgie had the same ability as Charlotte’s mother; that of being able to perceive the truth of someone’s thoughts in the most important times. She’d never blatantly announce such things, but she would certainly allow herself to guide her friends to the proper realization.
If they would be guided.
“I’m not in love,” Charlotte told her, hoping it would be enough to keep her from prying further, “and I am quite sane and sensible. If my witnessing the romantic journeyings of you all has taught me anything, it is that nothing is too serious if I still have my wits about me.”
“I did not realize that love had rendered us witless!” Georgie laughed, which made her son turn and reach for her face. She took his hand and kissed it, then directed the next words to him. “Auntie Charlotte thinks the frantic, mad rush of love makes us all fools, my lamb.”
Charlotte frowned at her words, though they were clearly meant in jest. No, that wasn’t what she thought, and that wasn’t what she wanted, either. She wanted more than that. Saw possibilities beyond that.
Craved higher than that.
“I don’t want the frantic, mad rush of love,” she managed in a low voice.
Georgie paused, looking at her with some concern. “What? I thought…”
Slowly, Charlotte shook her head. “I want that love that exists between a man and a woman who have been together for years, the couple that knows each other intimately and completely, good and bad, inside and out. The love that tells of trials and triumphs, victories and failures, and spectacular fights with tender apologies. I want the tangible love of those who have entwined their lives so completely with another that no individuals exist. Just the pair of them together.