the hardest things I’ve ever done, I can’t even call it a sacrifice. This is what I’ve always wanted for her.
To be happy.
To thrive.
In the morning, she’s off. A shuttle comes to pick her up—along with other students throughout the city—and take her to the campus about two hours away. I help load up her suitcases and wave her off as I stand on the sidewalk, putting on a smile, trying not to panic inside.
Then the shuttle pulls around a corner, and I’m all alone.
Chapter 3
I’m at work again, doing a double shift. My third double in a row, actually, but so what? Maddy’s not around to nail me for it, and nobody else knows or cares. My coworkers are just glad I’m able to cover their shifts. And, hey, extra money for me. I’ll stash it away in case some unexpected bills come up for Mads at her new school, although the scholarship helped a lot with defraying the costs.
Our lives haven’t been easy since Mom died, but I’ve never felt actually pathetic before. It’s hitting me just how little else I have in my life besides her, and I’m realizing I don’t really have any purpose besides taking care of my sister. I have no idea what I’m going to do with my life—you know, long-term. I don’t want to be a bartender forever, but fuck if I have any idea what my next step should be.
At least work keeps me busy. I can’t think too much about my sister or drive myself crazy worrying about her while I’m serving customers. I can’t obsess about whether she’s being bullied, struggling in classes, or has awful teachers if I’m telling off men for trying to hit on me, serving drinks like there’s no tomorrow, counting out change, and trying to avoid getting busted by Ajax.
I hand off a tray of drinks to one of the servers, Carla, then step back from the bar, wiping the back of my forearm across my forehead as I take a breather.
Now that schools are starting back up, the bar is slowing down a bit, but we still get a rush from about nine to eleven every night. It’s after midnight now, so things are slowing down, even for a Saturday.
I wonder if Maddy’s out with friends. Shit, I hope she’s not partying too hard. She wouldn’t do anything stupid, would she? No way, I raised her better than tha—
Damn it. I’m doing it again.
Work isn’t distracting me as much as I hoped it would, especially now that the rush of orders is slowing down. I need something else.
A soft snort bursts from my nose as I grab a rag and start to wipe down the counter. Maybe Maddy was right. Maybe I need to get laid.
I’m not looking for a boyfriend or anything. Fuck no. But I wouldn’t mind having someone to work off the stress with, someone to get me out of my damn head. I haven’t had sex in forever. Kind of hard to bring a man home when you share a bed with your younger sister. Talk about a mood killer.
Those three guys who came in the other night were fine as hell. If I could find one of them, I wouldn’t mind breaking my “no fraternizing with customers” rule.
I scan the crowd. We’ve got a few tables in the back that are almost out of my eye line, so I subtly lean over the bar just in case I missed them, but they’re not here.
Damn.
There is someone else, though. A man I’ve never seen before has taken over one of the corner booths all by himself. A pretty impressive feat if you ask me, seeing as how the bar hasn’t completely died down yet, and those booths can seat about five people, six if you really want to squish. He’s drinking like he’s trying to forget something, or someone. The perfect kind of attitude for a one-night stand.
He’s incredibly handsome too, with the kind of dark good looks that make him seem like he should be starring in a moody music video. Ebony hair, a slightly hooked nose, cobalt blue eyes, firm jaw, a slight bit of scruff—and holy fuck, his arms look thick and muscled enough that I probably couldn’t wrap both hands around his biceps. He’s got on a black button-up shirt that’s open at the collar, and on a scale of one to ten… he’s about a twenty.