It looks worse than it is, because Maddy walks in as I’m crawling back into bed, takes one look at me, gasps, and sprints over.
“Oh my God! Oh my God, Ellie, are you okay? Are you all right? What did they—”
“I’m fine, Mads.” I pet her hair and take her hand, squeezing gently. “I promise, okay? I’m all right. It looks bad, but it’s just some bruises.”
“Aurora told me you created some kind of… of sonic boom.” My little sister grabs the chair Aurora was sitting in and yanks it right up next to the bed so she can keep holding my hand while sitting in it. “That you knocked a bunch of people out and sent a car flying.”
“I don’t really remember too much of it, honestly,” I admit.
“But you do have magic.” Maddy sounds excited, and her eyes light up as she speaks. “I mean, I know it’s not—it couldn’t have been pleasant, the way you found out, but you have magic! That’s great!”
“Yeah. Unpredictable magic, which is apparently not all that fun and definitely dangerous.”
Maddy falters. “Yeah. I mean, I’ve… heard a bit about it at my academy.”
“Oh?” Based on her tone, I’m guessing it wasn’t anything good.
She shrugs. “Oh, you know, just people being people…”
“What did they say?” I raise my brows, making my voice firm.
My spritely little sister squirms under my stare and shrugs again. “Just that…” Her face falls. “That people with Unpredictable magic are freaks. That they should all have their magic suppressed for everyone’s safety. That they’re… psycho.”
Ah, fuck.
I suppress a frustrated groan. Of course. Of course I get the magic that’s going to make people keep me on the outside. Again.
“But it’s okay!” Maddy brightens up, ever the optimist. “Because they have schools for that kind of thing, and I don’t care what anybody else says—I think it makes you special to have that kind of magic. Plus, it means you can go to an academy like me, and we can learn magic together! I mean, not together together, but at the same time. And we’ll see each other on breaks. It’ll be amazing! I’m so excited for you.”
My chest constricts. It hurts to let her down like this, but…
“Mads.” I shake my head gently. “I’m not going to go to a school.”
Maddy stares at me for several long moments, and I see honest confusion in her face. She’s wanted magic for so long that I don’t think she can comprehend the idea of someone not wanting it.
“What?” she finally blurts. “Why not?”
I sigh. “I know you’re excited, but think about it. About what this all really means. You think I want to leave the life I know behind just to be called a freak and be the odd one out again? To play by the Circuit’s rules when they’ve never done anything for me, for us? Nobody helped us after Mom died, nobody even seemed to care that we existed, and now that I’ve got magic, they expect me to just march to their tune? I don’t think so.”
“But if you don’t…” Her voice drops to a whisper. “They’ll suppress your magic. Forever. Aurora told me. You can’t give up a gift like that, Elliot.”
“It’s my gift, my choice. I can and I will.”
“But Mom would be so sad.”
Shit.
Maddy doesn’t even know it, but she just played her damn trump card. She didn’t say it to manipulate me—my sister would never do that. But the thought of our mother, and of the life she hoped Mads and I would one day be able to lead, makes emotion tighten my throat. Our mom loved us unconditionally, with or without magic. But I know my sister is right.
She looks close to tears when she speaks again. “Mom would’ve been so happy you had magic, Elliot. She never gave up hope that you’d develop a gift.”
I swallow down the lump in my throat. My little sister crying is the one thing that always makes me melt.
“Sweetie, it’s okay.” I force a smile to my face, giving her hand a little squeeze. “I’ll be fine. It’s not going to hurt or anything. Aurora promised me that, and I believe her.”
Actually, I’m not entirely sure I do. But I’d let someone stick hot needles under my fingernails before I’d admit that to Maddy.
She wipes at her eyes. “You’re not happy here, alone; I know you aren’t. You’ve done such a good job taking care of me, and