My motivation across the board sucked. I wondered if, in the end, any of my hard work with school would matter.
My SAT results were due to arrive at any moment. I checked the mailbox religiously. As it was, I’d barely make the deadline for the University of Washington scholarship application. But would that even matter if my test scores weren’t good enough to apply?
“Hey. Where’d you go just now?” Bryan asked, eliminating the space between us, his muscular thigh in cutoff sweats bumping my slender one encased in denim.
“Worrying about school. The SAT results. The scholarship.” Since our graveside visit, the only secret I kept from him was that I loved him.
“Don’t worry,” he said firmly.
“Easy to say, but difficult not to,” I whispered while staring and losing myself in Bryan’s gorgeous gray-green eyes.
“Do what you can do.” He took my hand and squeezed it. “Then let the uncontrollable stuff go. Worry’s not going to change anything.”
I wondered if that could apply to my feelings for him. I wanted to tell him how I felt before prom.
War had made arrangements. I knew he expected me to go all the way with him. I was ready. Mostly. My only reservation being the guy beside me.
Amid a flurry of his footfalls, my brother reappeared. Exercise gear gone, his hair wet and slicked back, he was in jeans and a Tempest hurricane logo T-shirt. We’d only just started to seriously sell them at our shows.
“Change of plans,” Dizzy said. “Got a call. King’s having trouble with one of the fasteners on his kit. He’s waiting for me at the Troubadour. I’m headed there to see if this will do the trick.” He held up an adjustable wrench.
“Aw, man.” Bryan sighed. “I was really wanting to grab a burger before the show.”
My stomach grumbled. “That sounds good. I’m hungry.”
“Take Lace with you to get something. I’ll eat at the club. You guys better not be late, though. You know how War is about sound check lately.”
“Yeah, I know,” Bryan muttered. All our performances needed to be flawless now that fans were starting to record us and put their videos up on YouTube.
With a last glance at me, Dizzy took off, leaving Bryan and me alone.
Suddenly, I noticed how close he was. I felt his heat and mainlined his crisp, piney scent. Even after a workout, he smelled good . . . and all that goodness bore down on me like an avalanche the instant I heard the door to the house close behind Dizzy.
“Well, we’d better get going,” Bryan said, sliding away from me and standing.
“Yeah, I guess so.” I slid out the other way, when what I really wanted to do was throw myself at him and confess everything.
Maybe it was time. Maybe it wouldn’t change anything for Bryan to know how I felt, or maybe it would change everything.
Didn’t I owe it to myself to know? Wouldn’t that be taking his advice and doing what I could?
“Can we go for a walk on the beach before sound check?” I asked, my heart racing. “Maybe revisit that unfinished business between us?”
“Definitely.” His eyes hit mine with a force that rocked me.
War
“What the fuck?” I exclaimed, and Bryan and Lace broke apart from their embrace on the beach.
Lace was wide-eyed. She touched her lips as if being kissed by Bryan had made the heavens part and the angels sing, or some stupid shit.
Bryan stepped in front of her. “Man, don’t—”
“Don’t you fucking try to placate me, Bry.”
“But you don’t understand.”
“I understand just fine. Get out of my face. I wanna talk to her right now. I’ll talk to you later.” My gaze narrowed. “You feeling me?”
“Yeah.” He took the steps up to the street level from the beach two at a time, joining Dizzy and me at the top. But once he was up, I moved down to where she was, my heart sinking lower as I descended.
“C’mon, Bry,” her brother said. “Let’s go inside.”
But I tuned him out, tuned out the waves, the sunset, the whole sappy beach setup—all of it except her.
“Did you sleep with him?” I asked her, getting right to it. If Bryan had gotten where I hadn’t, it was over. The band, everything, because I’d kill him.
“No, of course not.” She put her hands on her hips.
“The attitude isn’t justified, babe. We have a rule. No touching the opposite sex. You broke it, not me.”
“I know.” Her eyes were glassy, but she didn’t back down from me or what