most secure location on the planet to a wave of criminals flooding the city. This could get a lot worse before it gets better. Actually, not could. It will get worse before it gets better.” Saying that made me realize I didn’t want him watching my back. I wanted him safe. I wanted him to stay right where he was, in my kitchen, looking too good for the circumstances. I didn’t want another death on my conscience and definitely not his. “Would you be pissed if I asked you to stay here and stay secure?”
“Yes,” he growled, his eyes turning black in a single heartbeat and his secondary scent filling the room. “Don’t do it. Don’t sneak off without me watching your back, Kaliya.”
“Fine.” I raised my hands, giving up on it immediately. The answer didn’t surprise me. Raphael was that guy who would do whatever was necessary for those he was loyal to. How I ended up being the person who got that sort of loyalty was beyond me, but I had it. That much was becoming very clear this dark, stormy evening. “It was a simple question.”
“No, it wasn’t. You would definitely leave me here if you thought I would get in your way and get myself or you killed,” he retorted.
“I don’t want you to die,” I answered softly, realizing honesty was the best policy right now. I had my secrets, but that was one I needed him to know. He didn’t need to know why. “That’s all. I love that you’re helping me, and it’s really nice of you, and thanks, but I don’t want you to die. I won’t make you stay here, though, if you don’t want to. Just wanted to ask.”
That stunned him enough to give me time to retreat, a raw vulnerability making my heart hurt a little. I didn’t even like this guy, but I didn’t want him to die.
I like him more than I want to admit. I hate his rigid sense of morality, but it’s respectable, and…
I wish I was the type of person he is.
Going back to my bedroom, I sat on the bed, sighing heavily. There wasn’t much to do until dawn, or the Tribunal got back to me. I had no idea what to do with the time, and I didn’t have anything to work with in this house. I listened to Raphael wander around, not really thinking about it, but kept a general awareness of him.
It felt like an eternity later, but he walked into the room and sat on the edge of my bed as if he belonged there. I tried not to let it bother me or give me any thoughts I didn’t need. His black clothing looked appealing, a stark contrast to the color explosion of my private space.
“What’s up?” I asked, looking at his back.
“Didn’t want to leave you in here alone.” He seemed to be staring at the door, a view he blocked. “I like talking to you, but it’s beginning to feel like we always argue.”
“We do always argue,” I confirmed, looking back at the ceiling. “We’re two different people from two different worlds with very little understanding of each other.”
I’m trying to get better, but damn it, I hate that you look at me sometimes like I’m a monster.
He chuckled darkly, but I didn’t know what was funny.
“Kaliya, I’ve always understood. I know I make you repeat it and explain, but this entire thing has made me realize I do understand. I just didn’t want to. I was raised to believe differently and…”
“So, you’ve been playing dumb?” I raised an eyebrow. “Thanks. Every time you do, it makes me feel like I’m awful and deserve to go rot in some hell realm.”
“I know,” he mumbled. “I’m going to stop. Well, try to. Some habits are hard to break. I don’t think you’re a bad person, I just think you made tough decisions.”
“You used to,” I accused.
“Yeah…” he agreed, nodding. He was turned away from me again. “Then I heard you talk about stuff in the prison, the sympathy on your face when you thought about what those monsters did to their victims and how you wanted them all to burn for it. And Wesley? If it weren’t for you, I would have written him off as one of Nakul’s or that redcap’s type. A killing machine, a monster. Something or someone who needed to be locked away because he’s evil. It’s not easy for me to admit that,