anymore. And hell, maybe I can show Buffy what a Slayer should be. The things I hate about her, the struggles Watchers have had with Slayers over the centuries—I can avoid them. There has to be a better way to keep our world safe, a way that doesn’t rely so heavily on pure violence. I’ll find it.
“It won’t be hard keeping it a secret from my mother,” I say. “She never notices me anyway.”
“Be patient with her,” Bradford says. “She’s lost so much. She’s very protective of you. But I believe it’s more dangerous not to train you.”
I don’t think he knows my mother very well. “Protective” doesn’t describe her. Cold. Unyielding. Even manipulative, now that I know the truth she’s hidden from us. And “protective” isn’t a word I’d use for a woman who left me behind in a fire. No, the only reason I can imagine she’s so against me being a Slayer is because she hates Slayers.
The thing I hated too. But maybe I only hate the way Buffy is a Slayer. The Slayer from the village in my dream last night—she was amazing. If she’d had someone to help her plan, she probably could have avoided dying, even. I want to be a Slayer and a Watcher in one.
“My sister said she’d help train me,” I say. If Rhys is off the table, Artemis will have to do.
Eve shakes her head. “It’s fine if she knows, as long as she can keep a secret from your mother. But Artemis doesn’t have the skill or experience to train you.”
“That’s not true, she—”
“Artemis is exceptional. But she hasn’t been fully trained. She’s been an assistant rather than in line for the Council. We have to give you the absolute best, Nina. You’re too important.”
My ego balloons, and I don’t even care. I have never been important in this castle, never been valued more than Artemis. Ever.
So I nod.
“Excellent,” Eve says. I lean forward, expecting a hug. Wanting one. But Eve holds out her hand toward Leo, gazing upon him with pure maternal pride. “I’m sure you and your new Watcher will be a perfect match.”
9
AS SOON AS EVE SILVERA and Bradford Smythe leave, Leo’s rigid stance relaxes, and he grins at me. Like he didn’t fall all over himself to agree I shouldn’t train and then go dead silent when they decided I should. Like now that he’s been assigned as my Watcher, we should both forget that happened.
“I can’t tell you what a relief it was when we found your mum and she told us you were all okay. It’s amazing to see you—it’s like old times.” He stares at me for a moment, and I could swear I see a hint of a blush. “You’ve changed. A lot. You grew up.”
“Yeah, that happens. And it isn’t exactly like old times. Those days I was on the balcony watching, not on the training floor. Ever.”
He flinches, then tucks his hair behind an ear in a nervous gesture. So he hasn’t forgotten either. Good. I mean, bad. I wish he had. But then again, if he had managed to forget the most humiliating moment of my life, I’d probably be even more offended.
“Of course things are different,” he says. “You’re a Slayer now. I’m not surprised.”
I raise an eyebrow. He didn’t want me to train as one, and now he’s saying he’s not surprised? “Really? Everyone else was surprised.”
“I always knew you were special. I’ll admit I didn’t assume that meant Slayer, but it does settle an old bet.” His face shifts into a sly smile. “I wagered Honora fifty quid that you would be able to take any of us in a fight one day.”
The mention of Honora is the last straw. “I don’t want to take anyone in a fight. Fighting is pointless. Your being able to throw a punch then didn’t make any of you better than me, just like being a Slayer now doesn’t make me any better than I was before.”
He cringes. “Right. I know that. I’m just—I think we got started on the wrong note.”
“You mean when you immediately agreed I shouldn’t train and we should look for other Slayers instead?”
The confusion on his face is deeply satisfying. He takes a hesitant step forward, and then one back. The small, mean parts of me exult in throwing him so off balance. Leo was always precise in everything he did. Right now? He’s a mess. And I made him that way.