Lily nods again, her smile only widening. “Yep. We’re going to nail down your issues and fix them so you can find your HEA.”
“My HEA?”
“Your happily ever after.”
I roll my eyes this time. “One, I’m not broken, babe. Two, fake dates aren’t going to work because I won’t act like me, so her notes will be worthless. And three, what’s going to make me even want to try if there’s no chance of getting laid in any way?”
Lily taps her chin, but the curve to her lips doesn’t go away. “One look at her and you’ll chase that tail, no matter where she goes or what she gives. You’re going to try harder than you’ve ever tried before, Carmello Caldo. Of this, I have no doubt.”
“You’re getting me excited here, Lil. I need a moment before I can walk out there and see her,” I tease, giving my little cousin a wink.
She groans a slew of curse words under her breath. “You seriously have a problem.”
“I do not. Ask the women I’ve been with. No problems for me, love. And I’m totally fucking with you. I don’t walk around with my dick hard all the time.”
“Thank God,” she mutters.
“Only sometimes. I’m a man, Lil. My body just does shit I can’t control.”
“Up,” she demands, motioning for me to rise. “It’s time to get ready to meet your teacher for the next month.”
“Ooh, is she going to paddle me?” I ask as I stand. “I’ve been a bad, bad boy.”
Lily purses her lips. “You’re going to be a tough nut to crack.”
“Literally,” I whisper.
“It’s just a short time, Mello. And afterward, we’ll have you on the road to your greatest desire and one step closer to a family.”
“After a month, my greatest desire will be an orgasm.”
Lily rolls her eyes again until the blue disappears.
Then it hits me.
Duh.
There’s always a loophole.
“Wait, I can see other people, though, right?”
“You want to date?” she asks.
“Well, no, but I’d like to bang some chicks, or I’ll seriously have blue balls after a month of nothing.”
Lily grabs my wrist, raising it between us. “You have a hand, darling. You’ll get used to using it.”
“My hand?” I gawk at her. “I’m not ten.”
“Ten?” she whispers, her lip curling in disgust. “You were masturbating at ten?”
I shrug, pulling my hand away. “Maybe nine. I don’t remember, but I didn’t have hair on my balls yet.”
She pretends to gag, but I ignore her. “Boys are so gross.”
“So, sex with other chicks…a yes or a no?”
“Do you really want your forever?”
I think on it.
Sex or forever?
Sex or forever?
God, that is a damn hard choice.
I am a man accustomed to pleasure and haven’t gone without sex for an entire month since my voice changed.
Could I do it? That is debatable.
But when I glance at Lily, she looks so hopeful and excited, I don’t have it in me to kill all her happiness and the dreams she has for me.
I place a hand on each of her shoulders and stare her straight in the eye, promising something I never thought I’d promise. “I won’t sleep with anyone else, Lily. You have my word. I’ll only fake date. If someone’s going to give me an orgasm, it’ll be her or my trusty left hand.”
“But you’re right-handed,” she tells me, like that means something.
“I jerk with my left.”
Her head lurches forward, and she covers her mouth. “I can’t. This is too much.” After a few seconds, she finally stops pretend puking. “She’s really going to have her work cut out for her, and the notes are going to be long. Probably a novel by the end.”
“I’m going to give her the full Carmello treatment.”
“Oh God,” she whispers, her eyes wide.
I smile, knowing I got this shit won even if it’s not a contest. “She’s in good hands. I promise.”
Lily shrugs off my hands, squares her shoulders, and says, “No, Mello. You’ve got it wrong, baby. I’m not worried about her. It’s you I’m worried about. I don’t think you’re ready for what’s going to happen.”
“I’m not scared, Lil. Bring it,” I tell her, welcoming the challenge.
Lily looks at me one last time before going to greet the mystery woman in the front of the shop. “Prepare yourself.”
“Totally prepared,” I mutter. “I’ll meet you out there in a few. I need a moment.”
“Don’t take long,” Lily says, giving my shoulder a light squeeze. “Or your future may leave before it starts.”
7
“What are you doing?” Those words come from Gigi as