Sinful Ever After - Vivian Wood Page 0,49

about to put words to her need. But she surprises me.

“No,” she says, her voice a wisp of sound. “Don’t, Aiden.”

My eyebrows arch. “You don’t know what I’m going to say, Olivia.”

“But I do.” She squeezes my hand. “You’re going to say that you are attracted to me. That you think about fucking me. But you know you can’t because you made a promise to my brother.”

I still. She’s absolutely right, shaking me to my core.

I believe what Grayson said.

I’m not at all what Olivia needs or deserves. But that doesn’t make saying it aloud in front of her any easier.

Things go awkward between us in the midst of all this silence. “You’re right,” I rasp.

Olivia tugs her hand from mine, turning and heading back up toward land. She slips once, making me start to move toward her. But she just keeps going, a determined set to her shoulders. She can’t be going that far, since I brought her here. Still, it fills me with a kind of guilt, knowing that she is so angry with me.

I feel like I’ve somehow let her down again. Like by choosing to obey Grayson’s rules, I’m somehow denying her something vital.

Glancing back at the sea, I sigh. I start following in Olivia’s footsteps to return to my Jeep.

When I get back to Olivia, I find her leaning up against the car door with a faraway expression on her face. It makes me wonder what she is thinking about. Instead of unlocking the Jeep, I lean next to her, folding my arms across my chest.

“I can’t keep doing this,” I say, squinting off into the woods.

After a moment she speaks, her voice quiet. “What?”

“This whole… like… will they or won’t they thing. I’m trying to be a better man. The bigger man. I’m trying to obey the only rule set out for me by your brother.”

Her lips twist. “And it just so happens to be a rule that says you’re not allowed to touch me?”

Sighing, I nod. “It does. Grayson has always been there for me, always supported me. For me to ignore the one thing he asks me not to do…” I go quiet for a second. “Please don’t make this any harder for me than it needs to be, Olivia. I’m asking you.”

Anger flashes across her face. For a moment, I think that she might actually hit me. “First of all, don't play the victim here. You are as much a part of whatever has been going on between us as I am. And secondly, Grayson does not run my life. He doesn’t get a say in who I go to bed with.”

My fists clench. It isn’t what I want, not by a long shot. But it is what I need to do. I blow out a breath.

“Fine.” I clench my teeth. “I choose Grayson, Olivia. First and foremost. That will always be my answer.”

She looks at me with the same hurt bewildered expression as if I had physically hit her. It rips my guts out that she feels the way she’s looking at me just now.

I’ve hurt her, before we were even involved.

Standing up straight, I go around to the driver’s side door and climb in. I unlock the passenger door and Olivia gets in, carefully avoiding my gaze.

That’s fine. I guess I can’t have it two ways, can I?

Starting the Jeep, I peel out, the tires squealing.

Chapter Nineteen

Olivia

Aiden made a mistake yesterday.

When we were at Tongue Point, he let down his walls, let me see the real him.

Not the sometimes-joker.

Not the player.

Just him, stripped bare.

I looked up into his dark eyes, his features so intense. He made a plea for me not to make his life harder. And when I fired back at him — said that he is as much a part of whatever has been going on between us as I am — I saw into his soul for a moment.

He’s going to crack. That resolution that he carries around himself like a flag used as a cloak — it is wavering. Then all his bullshit excuses about my brother being the reason he can’t be with me…

Well, I guess we will have to see.

I go back to work in the library, biting my cheek, wondering what the exact tipping point will be for Aiden. I’m more than a little distracted as I continue to catalog the last few stacks of documents. Every other line written in my ledger I’ve had to correct with white out.

My mind keeps