Shock - Marie Johnston Page 0,48
tell someone what I want to do. My dreams. “I guess I haven’t considered it.”
“But you’ve thought about becoming a paramedic.” He says it like it’s a given, but I haven’t. My life has done a complete one-eighty in a short amount of time and I’m only starting to catch up.
“I’m finally stable with a good job. I’m at a point where I can finally start thinking about what I want to be when I grow up, and it’s a great feeling to know that I can be anything.”
“What do you mean? You moved and took the EMT course.”
“Yeah, but the course was an accelerated one. A quick and easy way to earn decent money. Plus, I always admired the crews we hired for the big fundraisers. One time when I was in high school, a guy dropped from a massive heart attack at a campaign rally. The paramedic was on him in seconds. When Mom’s team followed up the next day, they got the report he’d survived. I never forgot about it. That and my grandma’s nursing tales must be why the course intrigued me.”
“Is being a career EMT what you want?”
“Mmm…maybe. It’s versatile and I enjoy it.” I chomp on my granola bar, taking off nearly half of it. Good thing I bought the slightly gooey ones that’re easy to chew or I’d risk choking. “Plenty of people are career EMTs.”
“With a little more schooling, you could be a paramedic. Just as versatile and you’d be great at it—and get paid more.”
“Maybe. I want to take my time and decide what I really want to do in life. Mitch has been on me about the paramedic course, too.”
“I’m not on you about it, Lia. I’m just asking what you want for your future. I’m not planning it for you.”
I sigh, releasing the tension that’s been building since he started this conversation. “I know, sorry. Mitch isn’t the only one that’s mentioned it. The boss sent me an email about it, too.”
“They don’t run the course every year. I’m sure they don’t want you to miss out. The company would pay for it.”
“I’d have to sign on for three years if they pay for it.” And I couldn’t afford to cover the cost on my own. I give him a playful shove with my elbow. “And then we wouldn’t be partners anymore. I’d have my own EMT to boss around.”
The corners of his eyes crinkle. “You think you’d want to be partners with me for another twenty years?”
“You think you’d want to be a career paramedic?”
His humor fades. “Like you said, it’s a good job. And I’m finally stable.”
Ford and I are at the same point in our lives. Both of us were flipped around and had to scramble to make a living. Is he asking me what I want for my future because he’s thinking about his own? “Are you certain your chance to get accepted to a residency has passed?”
“I’ve been out of med school for three years, Lia.” Resolve fills his voice and I want to hit him with the tiny flyswatter someone left in the swag bucket.
“Aren’t there spots in nearby towns that you can apply for? You’d get to be close to Jayden and it wouldn’t be as competitive.” I’ve never pressured Ford about his residency. Cass did that enough.
That doesn’t mean that I think Ford has to throw away his entire medical degree. He enjoys being a paramedic, but I can tell that it’s not enough. His mind is always working, anticipating what the ER physician will do once we leave. I know because I’ve asked him. What will the ER physician do? is a question guaranteed to start a long conversation that expands my own medical vocabulary in the process. But when I learned how hard Cass was on him, I stayed away from the residency subject.
He loves medicine, but he’s too limited in his role as a paramedic.
“It isn’t just that. I was matched with a prestigious pediatrics spot—and then turned it down.”
“A mediocre residency would still get you in the door.” His jaw turns to granite and I clasp his hand. Did I look this stubborn when he was questioning me? “Being a paramedic is an awesome career—not one everyone can do. Just make sure it’s what you want.”
I can’t read the expression that comes over him then. In a flash, he covers it with a grin that doesn’t reach his eyes. “Ready to head back?”
“Not until you tell me