Shattered Rose (Winsor Series) - By T L Gray Page 0,114

used to feel whenever he was around.

“Lord, I pray that you will bring to light what is hidden in the darkness and expose the motives of the heart. I pray that she sees you have set her free so that she can stand firm and never again be burdened with the yoke of slavery…”

21. CAUGHT

Parker met me at the coffee shop by the river just after eight and apologized profusely for it taking him so long. I assured him it was no problem and began rubbing his back as he sat down. He still seemed stressed and tense, and I felt for him.

“Your classes are that hard, huh?” I asked sympathetically as I tried to rub out the knots in his shoulder.

“Yeah, they are, but that I can handle. Feeling this distant from you is about to kill me,” he replied honestly, looking strained as he glanced at me. My breath caught at his words, not expecting him to be so forward.

“I’m right here, silly,” I teased, continuing to rub his shoulders and shake them a little. He shot me a forced smile and put his hand on mine.

“To make matters worse, I have to leave this weekend for my monthly training. The timing just feels all wrong.”

“When are you leaving?” I asked feeling disappointed.

“As soon as I get out of class on Friday. Hopefully Sunday will be a short training day and I’ll be back around dinnertime.” He put his hand on my leg and rubbed it a little. “I’m coming straight to see you, so don’t make any plans!”

I smiled up at him and put my head on his shoulder. He was right. The timing was all wrong, everything felt wrong. I wanted more than anything to click my heels together and go back to New Year’s. It felt like a lifetime ago.

“You eaten yet?” he asked, looking toward the counter.

“Nope, I was waiting on you. I’m starved.” He leaned over and gave me a kiss, pinching my chin at the same time.

“You know I love you right?” he asked looking me intently in the eye. I nodded and kissed him again before we got up to make our order. I sighed as I held on to him in line; I wished so much I could love him back the way he deserved.

The next few days flew by as I eased back into the school schedule. I would run, then hit the lab, go to class and then meet Parker in the quad. Jake would still come by at night, but only stayed for an hour or so just to talk and catch up. I started to believe my own lies that I wasn’t doing anything wrong and that it was perfectly fine for Jake and I to be friends. The guilt was less and less biting and while still strained, things did seem to be getting better with Parker, or at least I thought so. He continued to press me on a regular basis to talk to him, but I kept insisting there was nothing to talk about.

He left on Friday right after class, but not before meeting me outside my Dynamics class to say goodbye. I felt a little awkward with my study group staring blatantly at us, but I kissed him anyway and told him I would miss him.

“If there was any way I could get out of this, you know I would,” he said anxiously. He looked troubled as he looked at me.

“Parker, it’s just a couple of days,” I said laughing, trying to understand why he was so worried.

“I know. I just don’t feel like I should leave you alone right now.”

It finally registered to me why he would say that. He was worried I was going to have another episode. It all made more sense now. I shook my head realizing it was going to be exactly like it was with Cara.

“I’m not going to do anything,” I said defensively, pulling away from him. “You could just ask me about it instead of insinuating what a horrible failure you expect me to be.”

Parker looked stunned and then confused. “What are you talking about?”

“What are you talking about?” I answered, now wondering if I had jumped to conclusions.

“I am just worried because Issy is still gone and you’ve been so cold this week. Eventually those emotions are going to hit you, Avery, and I don’t want you to be alone when they do.”

I sighed as I realized what he was saying and immediately