The Shadows (Black Dagger Brotherhood #13) - J. R. Ward Page 0,235

was clear that, in spite of that moment of levity, Trez was hurting badly. He was wearing some kind of gray robe, and his skin was nearly the same color as the cloth. But he seemed determined to be present and participate.

iAm, on the other hand, appeared to have a serious case of vertigo. Like a guy who’d just stepped off a boat that had sustained heavy waves, he steadied himself on various things … the pool table, the sofa, the bar.

He declined the offer of booze. Took Coke instead.

Rhage was so damned happy they were home in one piece, but even so, he couldn’t man up for too much interaction. He told himself it was because of the raid on the Lessening Society they were going to do at that prep school with Assail and those two cousins.

It could well be a historic slaughter.

And then there was always the Band of Bastards on his mind. Even if he and his brothers killed off all the slayers and the Omega needed time to recoup the losses, there were still Xcor and his boys to worry about.

But the reality was, he still didn’t feel right.

And after a time, he became aware that he wasn’t the only one.

Layla was likewise standing on the periphery, one hand on her belly, her eyes straight ahead but not really focused on anything.

“You okay?” he asked as he went over to her. “You need Doc Jane or something?”

When she didn’t reply, he leaned in, “Layla?”

She jumped, and he reached out to calm her, as she mumbled, “I’m sorry, what?”

“Are you all right?”

“Oh. Yes.” She gave him the same sort of smile he’d given his Mary. “I’m fine.”

He was tempted to call her on the bullshit, but he wouldn’t have appreciated anyone doing that to him.

“You want me to call Qhuinn over?”

The male and Blay were talking with iAm, both of them nodding their heads … only to recoil in shock, as if they couldn’t believe the story that had, up until now, been delivered secondhand by Steve Wilko’s PR man over there with the phallic symbol on his forehead.

“Oh, no. No, thank you.”

As Rhage took in her affect, he thought, man, he really was as selfish as he thought he was. She had lost her blooded sister Selena just days ago.

Of course she would look like some version of Trez.

Standing next to her, Rhage wished he could help somehow. But he worried that he was as incapable of doing anything for her … as he was defining this seismic shift that had somehow occurred under his skin.

Ostensibly, everything was the same and all was well.

He just felt like a different male for no good reason.

And that …

… that he found terrifying.

Across town, at Abalone’s Tudor mansion, Paradise was sitting up in her own bed, in her own room, staring at the wall across the way.

She supposed she should have been happy. According to her father, the threat from the s’Hisbe had been neutralized, and everyone was safe … but she was completely unsettled.

Of course, she’d moved back home.

In spite of all her independent-streak posturing, the reality of living away from her father in uncertain times was just too dangerous. And this was a step back from her autonomy.

At least she still had her job—

The knock on her door was quiet.

“Yes?” she said.

As the panels swung wide, her father appeared in between the jambs. He was in his navy-blue silk bathrobe, the one that had the family crest stitched into the breast and the tie that was as long as the hem.

“You’re still up?” she asked.

“I could not sleep.”

“So much going on.”

“Yes.” He hesitated, looking around her room as if he were renewing himself with its acquaintance. “May I come in?”

“Of course, it is your house.”

“Our home,” he corrected gently.

When he only got as far as the edge of that needlepoint rug that covered the floor, she frowned. “Are you not feeling well?”

He opened his mouth to speak. Closed it. Tried again.

Failed.

Moving her legs over, she sat up. “Father?”

Her father finally came all the way forward, and that was when she saw that he had something in his hand. A piece of paper.

In lieu of an answer, he offered whatever it was to her.

“What is this?” she said as she took the thing.

Looking down, she frowned.

“Oh … my God,” she breathed. “My God…”

It was the application to the Brotherhood’s training program. And he had filled all of it out, in his own hand.

For her.

“Father!” Leaping up, she